I mean, it was a joke, but okay. Either way, it’s a feature that has been built in to MP shooters since, what, Doom? Quake, at least. Yeah, it’s not a competitive necessity or advantage, but it’s something that has no business being removed and sold as a premium bonus. You’re comparing this to skins, which have been…

It’s like every few months, Ja Rule remembers that he exists, then he suddenly recalls the Fyre Festival business and he excitedly wants to check in with everyone else to see if they remember too. Kind of sweet, in its way.

So, how long before you start having to pay for ammo in games?

That screencap is so white that just looking at it makes me want to annex Poland and openly question why I can’t say the “N” word. 

Oh sure, but even then, they know what sliced bread looks like. If they can manage to figure out how a sharpened piece of metal could be used to cleave items in twain, they’re pretty much set for mastering the art. 

Surely a significant percentage have bought a baguette or something, though. I’m no cook myself, I’ve fucked up microwave dinners, but I refuse to believe that too many people would show confusion when presented with a loaf and a bread knife.

I’ve nothing against streamers, I watch a couple myself sometimes, but good lord... I often forget just how much damn money some of them make.

Oh my god, I’d have loved finding something like that on a shareware disc. (I imagine the demo would be Desert Bus, but with the scoring secretly replaced by a nag screen)

That’s true! It just struck me as “Your friend can’t see you, fuck with them” instead of the more meta humor of S&M, but I’d have to see it for myself before passing real judgment. Maybe during a deep discount.

A (sequel? successor?) kind of came and went without fanfare on VR, but from what I’ve seen, it’s missing that charm that Smoke & Mirrors had. Shame, as VR Penn & Teller fuckery seems full of potential.

I saw exactly one this year, and it was New Power Generation knocking out some Prince jams. Great show, but if it hadn’t been the winner by default something else would have beaten it. Not their fault, just a very straightforward show with an underwhelming crowd.

Meanwhile, the members of Godsmack are just shaking their heads at T’s declarations. 

Hell, they’d even burn cartridges for you like CDs for a short period: https://segaretro.org/Game_Factory

1. This sounds interesting!

Going by the house they’re in, her “A Peleton!?” reaction was probably her way of saying “You only spent $2,000 on me? What are we, farmers!? Cheap ass.”

This this this. I share in his struggles, so I can’t hate the guy or anything since I understand where his meltdowns and quirks are coming from, but I reeeeally don’t think he’s cut out for this. He’s not very funny to begin with, and the stress of publicity is clearly doing damage. 

Embarrassing fact o’ the day: Not only did I buy a copy of that album when I was 13, but I bought the Walmart edited version. Yeah, I was a cool-ass kid. (in my defense, he wasn’t a national embarrassment yet, just a corny hick-hop guy we all thought would disappear from the public eye in six months)

Why’d ya have to go and remind me that Kid Rock has a steakhouse and that, ostensibly, there are people that go there?

I feel like this would have more effect if we established the size of one fuck. If fucks are microscopic, well, she still gives a lot of fucks. If fucks are the size of, say, the moon, then I am impressed by the lack of settings at this year’s Fucksgiving.

I’m a rather large (in height) man with a weirdly fast metabolism, an Italian background, and a strong penchant for the devil’s lettuce. I say all that because even to my absurd appetite, 40 Papa John pizzas in a month sounds like hell. And I am a strong believer in “even bad pizza is good pizza, unless pineapples…