OMG if I could turn into a bat or have one as a pet I would be the happiest pagan ever.

Then all my co-workers who tell me they will pray for me should be written up, that BS would NOT hold up in front of say the unemployment agency. What serious bull shit.

I am pagan, I stopped wearing a pentacle years ago because it got me all kinds of unwanted and hostile attention, especially here in Utah. Instead I wear not as well known symbols (and geeky jewelry cause I am a super nerdy). Real witches are not devil humping virgin sacrificers and people just don’t get that. I hate…

Thanks, it took years for me to be able to admit that story out loud. I was like 23 and now it’s ten years later I am all, “See my warrior scars!” Cause idgaf lol

Yeah, I like it :)

Man, at least he didn’t ask for a drink of your pepsi.

omg, that is just horrible, and I am horrible for laughing at it.

OMG this is great

Here are three more just for fun.

two years into dating my boyfriend I got food poisoning and had a very similar experience. We’ve now been married 2 1/2 years. I was so sick, the only thing I remember was lying on his couch and he kept trying to come out and cuddle because he felt bad I was sick. I had to keep telling him to get lost I was so…

My daughter started vomiting after throwing a fit at a Burlington Coat Factory, I wasn’t even thinking and caught that shit right in my hands.

dude ur dad was an asshole. Who does that to their kid.

I was stopped at a red light once, looked over at an abandoned food restaurant and watched a homeless guy take a shit at the back door. He was in plain view of rush hour traffic.

Oh I have a great one. I had to pick my best friend and room mate up from work at midnight because she didn’t have a car and I couldn’t let her borrow mine because I had a kid that needed to be picked up from daycare. (This was YEARS ago, I think my daughter was 3.) Around 7 pm I start feeling really sick to my…