Studio Exec: It's Maze Runner meets War of the Worlds; an intergalactic force comes down to the planet and begins constructing walls with gigantic blocks to cut countries off from one another so they can conquer us one nation at a time. Meanwhile, a top NASA scientist, her teenaged son who loves video games, and a…

"Whatever you do, don't make your other Christian friends drink the poisoned Jesus juice so you can all be with God sooner." - Satan

Oh, that is the best Facebook page I'm ever going to spend 3 hours trolling.

I have Comcast in Chicago and my service is pretty great. I'm a firm believer that as often as not a buggy router is to blame. My pairing of Comcast service with an ASUS RT-N66U router and a self-provided Motorola surfboard modem has led me to uninterrupted and fast internet for over a year. It's a pretty great combo.

Well it's the customers' own fault if they somehow think they can simultaneously cancel their service and get free HBO.

Don't you have a theorem to be working on? Get! Get!

Uh no, both comments say "17 hours ago".

Fun Fact: The plural of clowns isn't "bunch" but rather "crammed carful"

I hate to embarrass you like this, but just because your mother called you "Michael, darling" doesn't mean "darling" is your last name. Common mistake. I thought my name was "Lex Getoutofthattreerightnow" until I was 12.

At the very least, as a doorman you have the benefit of learning the ins and outs of the hospitality business.

…yet…

They disagree they should be punished for it. I can sympathize, when I was a child with no concept of action and consequences, I too used to think that about bad things I did.

As the cannibal who ate a portion of the_ellimist's torso, I can attest to this on two fronts.

IF you steal our songs, litigation never stops

The AV Club

I was wondering if anyone else remembered My Pet Monster. Good-ish times.

The kids call them omelicklets.

Nonsense, he's the southern Spacey his illegitimate father Tennessee Williams always wanted him to be.

It might sound crazy, but if you reread Romeo and Juliet it's perfectly clear that Mercutio was a giant blue cat.

Alright, but has your sandwich-heavy portfolio appreciated in value since last week?