Ahem.

I thought the book was about flowers?

I hate him so much, and I’m so, so tired.

He thinks he’s Monty fucking Hall (RIP, btw). He thinks a desperate crowd of hurricane survivors are an audience. He thinks he is the benevolent game show host, and that giving out “prizes” will win him the adoration of his loyal viewers. This is actually a horrifying tableau reminiscent of feudal times. The people of…

I’ve got no shock left for anything Trump says at this point - he was always a dim-witted narcissist and asshole who I now suspect must be suffering from some sort of serious cognitive decline - but....the government refused to lift food stamp restrictions...?

Point: Loneliness is slowly killing you.

“No word on what the penalty is if the rule is broken.”

Yeah, that’s a misguided criticism. There are real holes in Obamacare, and Democrats absolutely should work to fix them if there are any Republicans serious enough about governing to do so.

Get out of here with that adult thinking!

Democrats, rather than enjoying watching Republicans crash and burn their dangerous healthcare repeal bills, are apparently validating whiny Republicans by drafting a compromise bill behind-the-scenes.

I was told by the president that women let you grab them by the hoo-hah, but my wife told me that that is untrue.

Just be warned, conditions over there are pretty harsh right now. I volunteered to go over as a ham radio operator to help supplement their failed communication networks, and got a huge list from the Red Cross about the hazards - no power, limited water and food supplies, high heat and humidity without air…

I wish, but I live in Hawaii!

I mean, these write-ins are okay, but after we learned about Lord Buckethead standing for Parliament in the UK, I think the bar has been raised.

I like how the list starts at Preschoolers. For toddlers, it would simply have been:

“Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.”

Kushner registering to vote.

Spoiler alert: Megyn Kelly’s show sucks.

They do realize how terrible the optics of this decision are right? People have no water, food, and power in Puerto Rico and the government is asserting “we have the capacity” instead of giving what is at this point not just a policy issue but also a symbolic one. Others got a waiver and Puerto Rico didn’t. Puerto…

As I understand it, it’s not about the individual businesses so much as the legislation that protects them. The baker doesn’t have to serve gays, says the law, but he will have to serve the Satanic Temple. Generally, just getting the word out that Satanists are protected by the same rules that Christians are using…

I love that the Satanic Temple makes it their beeswax to be as ridiculously litigious as they can whenever shit like this happens. They are good eggs.