I met the man in a bar one night, he was only 22, I think, and just coming of hand surgery. I shook that huge paw too hard and Chris Kelly pulled my arm back. Brian Mcgratton gave me quite the look, I have never been so sorry for anything I've ever done to a man. Ray was all smiles, and boubght me a pint. For all the…

Stick tap Emery.

It wasn’t the strongest tease, but I learned that the UK has a children’s magazine that shares the name of a popular anti-gas medication.

Well, to be fair, host of a U.S. gossip t.v. show is a position of substantial responsibility and international significance.

Sounded like it. Also, what’s prompting this re-tread of a almost 20 year old article? Did she do something lately?

I did a Google news search in the middle of reading this.

Okay, who else read the headline and immediately thought Brooke Shields died?

I can’t help but notice that The Great Emu War is not on this list...

This is the best. TIL the following Governor was named after a man who could fart at will

Meanwhile, across the universe:

I would probably kill everybody too...

Right.  It’s like telling a person suffering from depression to stop being sad.  That’s just not how it works.  

He was basically having a hard time with the adjustment. I just kept telling him he needed to get out and meet people.

Never a fan of NCAA investigations but I feel like this is the next step in the rise of UMBC.

 Reid v. Covert, 1957

The only thing more England than being England immediately is tricking people into thinking you might not be England and then being England

Maybe when the assholes start calling the cops on a white kids lemonade stand or a white family bbq or a white candidate out canvassing her constituents 

Someone flagged your and Olerud’s comments as offensive, so that’s what they’re up to now.

Gary Neville probably cringed a lot too. Some say he’s still suffering PSTD symptoms, the way Peter Schmeichel constantly harangued him when they played in the same Man Utd defence.

The water level of the Chicago River is carefully controlled ever since the Army Corp of Engineers reversed its flow in 1900.