...Logan told CBS 6 on Friday. “The First Amendment says I can wear my hat.”

“makes zero sense.”

Just because you say those things are unbelievable doesn’t mean they are.

This is fair, but at the same time, if you call a place and ask “are you delivering right now” and they say “yes,” at that point it’s kind of on them.

There is a special place in hell for people who order delivery during snowstorms. And in that hell, crab rangoon will always be Three. Blocks. Away.

Holy shit, it’s THAT Wheaton Plaza. No wonder my parents were always iffy about me going there.

Really? I thought it was buying the coffee shop and running it into the ground.

Can’t possibly be worse than the Hot Dog crusted pizza Pizza Hut has been hawking for the last month, right? Right?

Different than what?

Entirely unnecessary, too, because Desi Arnaz wasn’t especially dark.

for FUCK’S SAKE

Yeah, cooking isn’t hard—but if you don’t have someone to teach you how to do it (particularly all the stuff that you can’t figure out from recipes, and you have to learn by doing), it can seem impossible.

We’re American. Sugared butter is offered at every county fair.

Fresh out of the oven cookies are fucking amazing, and I have no idea how you can disagree with that.

why don’t you just eat sugared butter if that’s all you’re after?

YES FUCKING THANK YOU

If I’m in the kind of mood that causes me to suck down an entire can of RediWhip (I know not real whipped cream), an entire tub of spreadable cream cheese, or vanilla ice cream covered in semi-sweet chocolate chips drowned in half-and-half; Imma do that shit in private because I was raised right.

We must be in-laws. My Husband hits everything with hot sauce, generally without even a courtesy taste. He bitched that I “only” put sea salt, cracked pepper and garlic on chicken before roasting....couldn’t I do something more interesting? Yeah I used to do “more interesting” before I realized it was just going to…

“EAT YOUR SHAME CREATIONS IN SOLITUDE LIKE THE REST OF US, FREAK!”*

It took me a little time, but I did train my husband about salt. He takes a bite before reaching for the shaker now. It only took a couple of times of me deliberately over salting a dish or two per meal to teach him to taste first. By over salting I only mean adding a little more than normal but enough that you would…