See? It sells itself. I’m available for consulting work, Chevy.

I get what you’re saying, but I’m pretty sold on this engine tower concept I’ve got going.

Maybe we should orient them so that the cylinder banks are on a different planes, maybe in some sort of V type shape.

Okay, so hear me out. I’m not a scientist or anything, but it seems to me like the solution here is to put two of the 4 cylinders into the engine bay. The truck’s big enough, it’ll probably work. Then you’ll get even more power, and surely that will lead to increased gas mileage. Right?

I want him to be successful just because a guy exercising choice about where he wants to work makes people so Mad Online. (See also: Durant, Kevin.)

As a lifelong Warrior fan it’s starting to get really surreal. The Warriors were toiling in so much obscurity that people didn’t even joke about them being bad because they didn’t even register on anyone’s radar. We were ecstatic when the Warriors came out of nowhere to become an elite team and win a championship.…

As a sad Knicks fan I can’t help but notice that Porzingis tore his ACL soon after Boogie yet no one has any clue if he will even play this season while Boogie is already back to dunking on fools.

If Cousins is still good why not keep him and send Draymond packing? I’m wondering if his injury history means you might keep him on the cheap, or if teams will still spend for him. 

The joke used to be that a redneck couldn’t count to 11 without taking off his pants but I guess that number gets a little smaller every time beer and power tools are near each other.

“if it aint broke, don’t fix it!” basically

That thing sounds like a Harley-Davidson parade being shoved through a wood chipper.

Elizabeth, this is reason #562 for you to get to an NHRA event this season. It’s like this ALL the time. Some events have displays of vintage dragsters and all they do is fire them up throughout the day. They might even let you do it! Your eyeballs will be vibrating for days.

Well, in McDavid’s defense I’d be pretty pissed off if I was an Oiler too.

ROFLCOPTR, wow, just wow. You deserve more stars than I have to give.

What a coinkydink. My company builds the relatively heavy Black Hawk.

If those are inches, I’ve got a 10 ft dick.

Goddamn seriously

reminder #436 that the NHL and sports don’t deserve how awesome the Subban family is

The real question, of course, is: who are the GLORY BOYS who walked right past that gorgeous bitty girl with her fist out, granting them elite sportsbaby luck, with nary a backward glance? For shame.

Ugh. My heart. My uterus. This is too cute.