“Because I, too, have a mediocre child who would’ve never gained her level of success but for nepotism and privilege!”

I’d have to go back and double check, but it seemed like EVERY single time Chris Harrison spoke he mentioned Colton’s virginity.  Every into.  Every outro. It was gross. It was awkward. He should be ashamed and embarrassed.

This seems like a pretty reasonable take.

Either you die a hero or you tweet live long enough to become a villain another asshole.

You know, there is only so many intersections a person can navigate at once.

Tayshia would probably be too boring because she’s grounded and reasonable. Nobody wants to watch grounded and reasonable people on dating shows. 

Prediction: Cassie is gonna cheat on Colton with ( newly married/ newly daddy) Arie ..... and I’m all the way here for it

TMI warning: I dated a virgin religious dude for far too long and though there was no penetration, I have a difficult time thinking of him as a virgin.

“Over The Jeans Island”

Tayshia was robbed and the only reason I am happy about this is to think how pissed off Caelynn is right now tee-hee.

Had I downed a shot of booze every time Chris Harrison referred to Colton’s virginity last night, I wouldn’t be alive to type this right now. Plus by the end of the season that shit was soooooo tired and beaten to death. I mean, we get it, he hadn’t had sex (supposedly).

I swear there had to have been major collusion…

This is virgin on the ridiculous.

If you call your daughter a dumb bimbo for choosing to do something that you don’t personally find valuable then supportive doesn’t mean what you think it means. 

The idea of rich people getting all puckered up when cops show up on thier doorsteps puts a smile on my face.

Jane Buckingham, a so-called “millennial expert”

Oh Linds, as a recovering alcoholic, nobody can keep somebody else sober for long. 

How are these kids going to pass their classes once they get there or is that another round of bribery?

Yeah, I really want to be a fly on the wall when JANAVS’ two daughters read the transcript of that phone call in which he flat out says one of them is too dumb to catch on to this scheme but the other one might figure it out.

“Annnnd they’re off. Into the first turn is Mama’s Boy followed by Really, Him? and If Flour Was A Person. Now If Flour Was A Person is making their move, If Flour Was A Person is coming to the inside followed by No One Wants to Sleep with You and Another Privileged White Boy. It’s still If Flour was a Person, If…

So tonight we’re rooting for a crying, entitled man-baby to browbeat a woman who’s expressed clear disinterest in him into half-heartedly entering a doomed relationship with him under duress so she won’t be framed as the asshole who broke the Bachelor’s heart on national TV?