Just as long as it’s not the other, other Jeff Davis, the one who ran the Confederacy!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Sleepaway Camp is a movie from another dimension where slasher flicks, instead of evolving from giallos and 60's psycho-horror movies, instead evolved from coming-of-age kids movies.

Clearly they can still do the show with the character Roseanne Conner, but now she’s played by Christopher Plummer.

Peter O’Toole: the man perpetually almost getting around to killing Hitler.

Were they ever successful? We might be able to start a parallel list of media about failed Hitler assassination attempts. Here’s two I can think of:

The low budget TV movie “Rogue Male”, which starts with Peter O’Toole missing der Fuhrer with a sniper rifle. Based on a novel written when Hitler was still alive, and…

From what I understand the Russ Meyer joint “Up!” begins with a (presumably) busty lady disposing of “Adolf Schwartz” using the ol’ sneak-piranhas-into-his-bathtub gambit. Classic.

From a screenplay by an uncredited Roger Ebert.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: The Super Mario Bros Movie would make an awesome game. It just wouldn’t be a Mario Bros-style game. I’m picturing it as a point-and-click adventure, maybe by Sierra.

I have a mp3s of a couple of old mid 60's novelty albums that I found online, titled “Tortura: the Sounds of Pain and Pleasure” (Volumes 1 and 2), which claim to have been recorded at a real orgy! They consist of nothing but slapping sounds and moaning.

“Sex with the Headless Corpse of the Virgin Astronaut”

Then there was the time that Jeff Goldblum was reported dead, and Stephen Colbert had a eulogy for him on his show... read by Jeff Goldblum.

1.) I’m going to say the Adventures of Robin hood, which I saw at a revival at the Neptune Theatre (now a music venue) when I was about five or six. After that I was crazy about Errol Flynn, and saw Robin Hood, Captain Blood, and the Seahawk a ton of times on VHS. I told people that I wanted to be Errol Flynn when I…

Sir, admit it, you were partying in there with those seagulls! It was you, 47 seagulls, and the shade of Keith Moon. The hotel room was never the same again.

And you know what they’ll pack him in for transportation from con to con?

Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill!

For basically the same reason, I might have to choose Flash Gordon.

You’ll never get credit for my discovery, who’s going to believe a talking head?
Get a job in a sideshow.

Unfortunately, Nevermore (not a bad song, but not nearly as memorable) disrupts the otherwise rock solid progression of Ogre Battle / Fairy Feller’s Master Stroke / March of the Black Queen.

Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis, and the rise of the Sons of Arius, there lay an age undreamed of. Onto this, Bob Funch, destined to wear the jeweled crown of Aquilonia upon a troubled brow. It is I, his chronicler, who alone can tell thee of his saga... of the days of high adventure!

I’m in a psych rock mood today (and most days), so that’s what you’re getting, with one obvious exception.

There once was a senator from Mass.