I assume he could also have checked his platinum card.

Surely he’d recall his identity after just one look at his monogrammed thermos.

Okay, guys. Not cool. CLEARLY the “Do you know who the fuck I am” guy had amnesia, and genuinely needed the help. Maybe he’s a secret double-agent from the Mars rebellion. Or maybe he’s just from a soap opera. But either way, that was clearly a cry for help, which would have led to a cool ‘80s sci-fi action movie.

That woman sounds insane!

Look, I get that parenting can be hard. And I, personally, do not think having a dog and having a kid are the exact same thing. They’re not. BUT, I will say, that I think having a dog prepares you just a tiny bit for the hard work that will come when you have a kid. Allow me to explain: it lets you know just how much…

So, because one woman somewhere can’t bring her kid to work, we should deny the women in my office the option of bringing their kids to work, even though they’ve been doing it for ages, with no consequences? I’ll walk down my hallway, and tell Maggie to get the kids out, because it’s not fair to Target Lady that…

Anne Hathaway is pregnant! Isn’t that great? A source says she “wants to keep it quiet” until she “has an official pregnant belly,”

With who? I definitely see your point, but it is frustrating when people say “leave the baby at home” as if it can just chill there in the crib alone nbd. Leaving the baby at home means paying someone a ton of money, having a fantastic support system most people don’t have, or having access to a day care that is…

While I agree there are certainly many adult-only events where its inappropriate to bring children... this was a conference on empowering women. Women have children. This seems like a perfect opportunity to buck the expected. How phenomenal would it have been if this women gave the presentation with her kid strapped…

I've yet to procreate, but to me that's basically what babies are: adorable chaos.

I used to comment regularly on Jezebel for years (under a different name) and stopped because of the feeling the author describes when someone she assumed would be an ally made her feel unwelcome.

Wut. Tell me more.

Yes. I don’t do “Mom” friends, they are completely forced and boring. I also hate it when someone tries to make “Mom” friends with me, if you introduce yourself as “Adrian’s Mommy” I think less of you, as you obviously think less of yourself as you didn’t deem yourself worthy enough to even have your own name.

I don’t want mom friends. I have friends who are also mothers but friendships based on mom status are annoying, micro-managing, competitive contrivances. I’m sick of talking about, living for, and obsessing over my kid. Can I just have friends that are mine instead of strategic plans for my child?

I read that as “Soup R’ Crackers” at first and was confused/delighted.

“What’s homo milk? Is this milk from GAY COWS?!” he demands, utterly* seriously, even angrily.

we get it, you're very cool

When I managed a Borders we were also responsible for this small calendar kiosk on the other side of the shopping center. I was there covering someone’s lunch break and this crazed woman came over demanding why we had no bichon frise calendars. The dog calendar people were always the weirdest.