Vote No on Proposition Infinity!

This was sort of predicted by Futurama in the episodes I Dated a Robot and Proposition Infinity.

Me:

We just let the Russians and Assad decimate every innocent woman and child in Aleppo, raise it to the ground, and now their agent orange is going to be our POTUS (on paper anyway, but Never My President!).

So I guess this is the point where Syria becomes the tolerant, multi-confessional, secular, democratic state that dozens of Assad apologists/Russian disinformation stooges have been assuring me for months that it will be.

Be careful what you wish for. Come January, what’s bad for Mother Russia will be bad for the USA.

President Gunn to Congress: “MAKE. IT. WORK.”

President Gunn’s State of the Union:

I hope that young people of today are tired of our fake reality tv bullshit and they’ll embrace documentaries and science and all the good, sincere parts of the world and when it becomes cool to worship at the feet of physicist and biologists all will be right with the world once again.

Massive opioid addiction in rural America with no end in site.

I think Hell must be Newt, Rudy and Christie in a room together. For eternity. The Devil is Ted Cruz.

Every headline should be Trump supporters: stupid as fuck.

Look, Newt’s just looking out for himself. As an actual swamp creature, he would be personally affected by a loss of habitat.

As terrifying as this whole thing, the schadenfreude I get from seeing supporters’ eyes open about how they were conned has been beautiful. Just beautiful.

Never forget, Newt was the guy who literally served his wife divorce papers while she was recovering from cancer surgery. And then cheated on the women he left her for (and married) with the woman who became his current/3rd wife. And once told a girlfriend that he could only have oral sex with her (him receiving, of…

Of course. What better way to guarantee you’ll get something right than to be on literally every conceivable side of any argument?

Cancelling an onerous and ineffective public surveillance program. Classic move of a tyrant. What’s next in wanna-be dictator Barack Obama’s mad quest for supreme authority? The peaceful post-election transfer of power as the Founding Fathers intended? Shameless.

No, Donald, we don’t “know your plans” because every time you allegedly discuss them, you speak in incomprehensible gibberish.

“You know my plans. All along, I’ve been proven to be right. 100% correct.”

I am Muslim and I’m proud and grateful to be an American citizen. I love this country and I feel blessed to have many opportunities here that I don’t have in other places due to my disability and gender. I will miss President Obama. Trump and his cronies can go ahead and register me in the Muslim database. I’m not…