So we on the left are the patriots now and they’re the commie-loving traitors, right? Russia has taken over without firing a single shot and we are now a banana republic, being ruled by a puppet government. I can not comprehend what’s happening, I just can’t.

This is her 9th arrest in Charlotte County and the bride says that they are no longer friends.

Anthony Weiner not being dead in a ditch or renditioned to a black site in Yemen is proof that Hillary ain’t killed nobody.

Remember when some magazine put the Kardashians on the cover and called them “America’s First Family,” and people freaked out?

I hate this normalization crap. I hate hate hate hate hate it. ENOUGH. Why the FUCK is there even a special like this about this gross person and his family? His family which ISN’T EVEN GOING TO LIVE IN WASHINGTON.

I believe at this point, it’s appropriate to call him the PEEOTUS

fave joke thus far:

They have only known each other for 60 years. We should wait at least another decade before we decide if their relationship is up to heteronormative snuff.

For christ’s sakes they didn’t even televise one for a million dollar pay out and then split as soon as the checks were cashed. Don’t they know how this works?!

Right? this guy could have been at least on his 3rd gay marriage by now, just like our rotten pumpkin elect! Sad!

She keeps objecting when I grab her genitals instead of the beer! Who needs a feminazi like that for President?

That was just the excuse. They deemed her unqualified because she was a woman, and because they didn’t “relate to her” and she wasn’t someone you could “grab a beer with”. ‘Merica.

It’s now considered a point of positive credit that our incoming Attorney General will publicly admit that grabbing women’s genitals without permission is, in fact, sexual assault.

See, this is the problem with our justice system—the black man gets all the blame, but the people who made that jacket get away scot-free.

Not the hero we deserve, but the hero with weed.

Guns don’t lose luggage. People lose luggage.

Meanwhile Florida legislators are actively trying to remove bans on guns in airports....makes sense

I think you just became the voice of your generation.

I’m just about ready for Hollywood to get over their Hiddleston-Cumberbatch-Redmayne high. There are far more talented and far less pale actors out there that they could be creaming over.

Healthcare issues asside, what is this sexist bullshit? I never wear any of these things and I am female. You know what I wear? Bras and menstrual pads. Those are the only specific female itmes I can think off that I wear. Sheez why does “being female” always gets reduced to stereotypes?