“Try treating yourself sometime, you might find it actually feels good even if they are unnecessary.”

Pro tip: store your spare shower beer in the top tank of your toilet to keep it cooler than room temp. You are right though, warm beer is better than no beer.

Gold bond over amens or baby powder

Q-tipping my ears is the closest I’ll ever get to comprehending how a woman feels during PIV.

Yup. This is “adequate man,” guys. Not “superextraordinarypretty man”

I like the cut of your jib re: #6. Cleaning out my ears is strangely soothing for me.

Also, I can’t say I’ve never used duct tape and toilet paper as a bandage.

This is the correct list. Idk any guy with coconut oil and facial masks ready to go in their bathroom

Counterpoint:

Counterpoint: these are all unnecessary unless you’re trying to be a model or something. Just practice basic hygene and you’re fine.

This is a bunch of horseshit.

My face is going to age gracefully like a well-worn baseball glove. Like Robert Redford. I’m pretty sure he’d drink Bay Rum before putting any of this nonsense on his face.

1. Extra Toilet Paper

Teresa is just trying to hold all the rights to Earnhardt name and all the profit that goes with it. She has nothing else other than the name to make money from. That’s why she doesn’t want the kids using the name, because there’s no money for her in it.

>Schumacher Homes

You can piss right off with that noise, young son.

Died on the job, yet doing what he loved...gonna call it a draw.

This makes me feel like saying: “Chris Bosch, please take note of this tragedy.” So very sad. I love watching sports but incidents like this make me wonder if we aren’t testing the limits of human capabilities. Random musings aside, my deepest sympathies go out to his family & loved ones.

French horn it is

Goddamn, Marchman. You are such the fucking hipster. “Once you’ve heard of a band, they should just go away and retire. I only like them until everyone likes them. I wear my hatred of the bands I used to love like a badge of honor.”

“BY DEFINITION, IT’S BETTER THAN WHATEVER PRESTIGE TELEVISION SHOW YOU’RE WATCHING.” - Marchman

Does Marchman play an instrument? If so, it’s that instrument.