Hollywood to Harvey:

Dear Harv,

None of us actually like you, and now that you’ve lost all the power you once had, we have zero interest in sticking up for you. Kindly go climb a wall of dicks.

— Everyone you’ve ever spoken to

Of course she feels empathy for Harvey. She looks almost exactly like him.

Nobody’s gonna listen to you anymore except senile old people and nerds who are still furious nobody would fuck them in high school, Steve. Give it up, stop humiliating yourself, and crawl back into the sewer drain to resume your previous life of terrifying passing children and generating spores.

Maybe treat yourself…

My takeaway from this is: Being a hateful prick ages you prematurely, but doesn’t kill you early nearly as much as it should.

I mean fuck, I’m 36 and I still get carded if I shave. Add some wrinkles and this dude could get a senior citizen discount at the Christian movie theater.

Hey Steve, until people start to confuse…

I spent a good amount of time in Amhurst, Mass, and yeah it’s exactly that. You’ve got a lot of farmers and older conservative folks around there, but it’s also where U-Mass is. You’re about as likely to hear some old lady drop the n-bomb as you are to pass a big protest full of college kids.

What’s weirdly missing…

While it is waaaaaay too late in the game for this to be vindication of anyone complicit in this shitshow...

I gotta say, sick burn there, Republi-bruh. I like it because it’s short enough for President Wario to both read and comprehend on his own without needing to be loaded up with Adderall first by his handlers -…

Dear Discount Chad Kroeger:

Saying “hey a bunch of racist shit I said wasn’t supposed to be public” does not constitute an apology, and if anything just makes you look like even more of a racist piece of shit. Given that you are technically a lawmaker, we feel you should probably already know this, although admittedly…

Something worth pointing out for the folks unfamiliar with Tokido: Dude’s kind of a troll. Not in a mean-spirited way at all (I’ve met him several times and he’s unfailingly a super nice person) but consider that he gave that nickname to himself. He’s got a very deadpan sense of humor, but he knows exactly what he’s…

...Wait, Little Richard is still alive?

This is a really good deal for folks who have a desktop PC but are using onboard graphics. You’ll see a hugely noticable bump, and it’ll enable you to play pretty much any games you feel like. Anything from 2014 and older will also likely run full-bore at 1080p, and that kind of thing still looks plenty impressive.

Unfo…

This is a really good deal for folks who have a desktop PC but are using onboard graphics. You’ll see a hugely…

Really good game! Yeah, it’s not exactly Super Metroid in terms of quality or scope, but it was also mostly made by one guy and not a megateam at Nintendo. It’s also ten fucking dollars, so your price-to-awesome ratio is through the roof here.

The soundtrack alone is less than the cost of a CD (lol) and better than…

Really good game! Yeah, it’s not exactly Super Metroid in terms of quality or scope, but it was also mostly made by…

Eh, I’ve met him. He’s not. He’s a little awkward for sure, but seems like a sweet guy.

He’s also a ridiculous fucking prodigy at fighting games, like, Bobby-Fischer-At-Chess levels of good. As long as he doesn’t become a Bobby-Fischer-At-Racism level of douchebag, I’m down for rooting for him.

Hey Wikileaks, you know how you kinda screwed the pooch helping get Lord Cheetostan elected?

I can think of a fantastic thing you can host that’ll fix that. Something nobody wants to watch but everyone wants to exist, ifyaknowhwatImean

You’re talking about a subset of people who communicate primarily through memes, having given up on regular conversation long ago.

Just like how “cuck” to them has come to mean “person who exemplifies weakness” as opposed to “person whose wife is fucking someone else” (none of these people have wives, or sex, so I…

Oh, I know you think so. I pointed this out because readers of this site will see the kind of stuff you say and immediately and correctly have you pegged as at least a few of the following:
- Someone with a comprehensive knowledge of 4Chan memes.
- Someone who got sent to the guidance counselor a lot for writing essays…

You gotta understand two and a half things about the conservative mindset for this to make any sense at all.

1. “If it doesn’t sound right to me because I’ve never heard of it before, you’re making it up.” — Conservatives’ default assumption is that everyone outside of their personal bubble whom they know to be a…

You could knock “street” out of that and it’d still apply.

“I’m sorry I got caught.”

Hey Harv, know what would’ve been a more elegant and possibly less career destroying move than this horrible letter? Falling on your own sword and admitting to this before getting called out for it. You know, since you’re all woke and shit now, you’d figure you’d want to atone for past sins…

You know how referring to someone as “black” is fine, but referring to them as “a black” or collectively as “the blacks” is an immediate indicator that you don’t particularly think highly of that group of people?

Same idea.

I’m sure the dudes who are going to go after her now are going to be exactly the kind of fairytale romance she had in mind. Lord knows how many kind, well-adjusted men lacking micropenises and the required compensatory massive gun collection/truck will leap at this opportunity.

Let us know how that works out for you,…