Remember how they used to insure actresses’ (and Mary Hart’s) legs for PR purposes? They should do that with Issa Rae’s smile. It is the most amazing smile.

Weeping.

Couldn’t they embrace this and do a “throwback” mall—themed mall? With all the old stores you only got at malls, like Claire’s and Spencer’s and Sbarro’s? Bring back the sunken food court atrium and a Musicland straight out of Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Kids love the retro shit.

Guys - Amazon. I just paid $9 for 25 tests. And they totally turned with both my pregnancies like day 1. They are not fancy. They do not have curved handles or soothing colors or digital outputs (can people really not read “1 line” vs “2 lines”??). They are hella cheap. They work hella good. #psa

Yes to your last line. I fucking HATE people who want to sit back and “blow up the system” because it generally means they know they’re going to be OK and fuck the poor slobs on the bottom who will suffer the most. There’s nothing “progressive” about that.

I love that you love yourself enough to be alone. I am working on that, I am with someone who does not love me and have been for a very long time because I am so afraid. I am not much younger than you, and today you gave me strength. Thank you.

I had a very strange complication with my last birth: Peripartum Cardiomyopathy. No one listened to me when I described my symptoms in the hospital (one of the biggest and best in the country, btw) after delivering a very healthy baby following a very healthy and uneventful pregnancy. I was discharged but at home, my…

When I was a kid, in northern Australia, we used to wear these things we called ‘stinger suits’ - basically an all in one rashie that goes down to your wrists and ankles. We wore them not just for sun protection (although with one of those on and a bit of zinc on your nose you were done for the day) but primarily to…

I just get so mad when people give me shit for covering up on high UV index days. For fuck’s sake. The pool I go to with my son (who also wears a rashie and a hat and long boardshorts), has zero shade, and is entirely white painted concrete. We’re in the Midwest and that prairie sun beats down just like in the desert.…

I LOVED THAT FUCKING HAT AND EVERYONE WHO DIDN’T CAN GO SUCK AN EGG.

One of my 10th graders walked into my room this morning, beaming. “We’re gonna have a Black princess, y’all!”

Have you seen Fear The Neighbor on Discovery ID? I promise you, it could have nothing to do with politics.

Synthetic wig tip - if it’s tangled and messy looking, soak it in cold water and fabric softener. Use an unscented brand if you don’t like the smell, because it will stay with the wig. Use enough softener that the water feels slippery between your fingers. Comb the wig while it’s wet, start with the widest tooth comb…

I feel so old. Raise your hand if you were watching season 3 when Keith was kicked off for pattern books!

It’s basically why I binge watch Hoarders.

Yeah, it’s crazy how much of that stuff flew by me as a kid. I loved them because I loved Robert Asprin, and so hey, another fantasy series full of puns, sounds good. But I recently revisted them. and What. The. Fuck.

A female character who changes depending on the time of the month! GENIUS!!!

Piers Anthony’s depiction of women generally is horrible. I LOVED his books as a young reader, until finally the “WTF?” pile built up too high and I just couldn’t move past it anymore.

Just your run of the mill 89 year old sexpot who claims that she was a contract player in Hollywood and slept her way to the middle. With a purple Cadillac and a purple house and a purple poodle and a preference for purple satin bras that show off the boob job she got in her 70's.

I thought about reinventing myself and then spending the entire rest of my life acting out the charade I have always wanted to become. Then I remembered I’m tired and just didn’t have it in me. So, I took a nap instead.