Oh man. This had dog written all over it from the trailer. It really did play like an SNL parody sketch, with the most cliched dialogue snippets ever (“He’s taunting us!!”, “He’s completely insane,” “The only thing we know for sure... is that he’s playing games with us!”). It’s like they just grabbed the scripts of…

Hey, that ain’t Dolph Lundgren.

“Alright, Mr. President, all you have to do is talk to her for 30 seconds, say he was a brave man, an honorable man, and just say ‘We are thankful for his service’ at any point.”
“GOT IT.

YOU THE DEAD GUY’S WIFE? HEY...FUCKER HAD IT COMIN’. BUHLEEF ME.”

This headline makes me try to imagine David Letterman saying, “I may have fucked up my life flatter’n hammered shit, but I stand here before you today beholden to no human cocksucker, and holdin’ a workin’ fuckin’ gold claim, and not the U.S. government tellin’ me I’m trespassin’, or the savage fuckin’ red man or any…

Exactly. Trump should not have been President of his own fan club, let alone the President of the United States.

FIFY:

Is Vincent Chase in this?

Glad Fox News is keeping up with the times by finally weighing on a “hip” band that has been around for almost a quarter of the century.

You think facts and reality are helpful tools to argue with a lying narcissist. That’s cute. I used to think that way, too.

Whoa that’s some good context! Makes the original costume make more sense for sure.

Trump then went on to say that he would be starting a new tradition by holding a State of the Union address every year, something his predecessors never did, and is not even required anywhere in the Constitution. Because he cares that much that we know all about the hard work he’s doing in office.

This is the first time I’ve ever wondered what’s going through the mind of a Halloween costume model.

I’m putting odds at 70% that Trump still hasn’t called any of the parents, though it is possible an intern has written the letters.

As far as my experience, you either know that Anne Frank is a young girl who wrote a famous diary and was killed by the Nazis or you don’t know who she is, at all.

Yeah, we’re well beyond the point where Leroy’s skepticism makes any sense. It needs to be redirected to being less skepticism about the supernatural and more believing Max about it but being skeptical of him anyway.

When Barry was explaining to Max about the succubus, I though he explained that she used a form of hypnosis on the victims.

I don’t know how far into the show are you, but Debbie does get to question Ford’s techniques basically as unscientific in one short but I think important scene, which may or may not play out in the end (or later in the series).

I totally agree; the sex scenes are pointless other than ‘look at these hot people doing it’ okay back to the guy that fucked his mother’s head and then placed it on his mantle and screamed at it for a few hours. I’m not a prude or anything but like, the shit between Debbie and Holden is even goofier/unnecessary than…

eeehhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggggggggmmmmmmmmmmmmmaybe

They played with that angle a little bit in the pilot, too, with him being skeptical about the abduction after all the stuff with the severed head. It feels like some artifact of an earlier draft that shouldn’t keep cropping up but does.