Can they ban Cruz, Hawley, and all the other bootlickers?

I was really hoping that in all the commotion, someone would punch Ted Cruz’s eminently punchable face.

One of these is not like the others

But will it elbow me in the ribs when I snore so that my spouse doesn’t have to?

I don’t know why they spent all this money and effort to do this, when a free Bible can tell anyone the universe is somewhere around 6000 years old.

Obviously the only person who can stop the blackmail conspiracy is the one who is actually being blackmailed by Russia. It’s like a circular human centipede, the shit just keeps making its way around. 

Good. With minimal data on long term efficacy, this is the right move. The worst possible outcome is that we get like 50% of the population vaccinated over the next 4-6 months (very very optimistically) and then find out that the immunity from the halfsies dosing is wearing off and that the susceptible pool hasn’t…

Oddly enough, I find this version of the Smashmouth song more tolerable. 

The ancient taco bell shits were extra spicy

This dance will be the last thing humans will see before being disemboweled by that yellow robot

This being Florida, he was definitely fucking the feral hogs

Once you get gas involved, then you’re at risk of anal gonorrhea too

It’s a good thing that all the young people are doing such a good job social distancing and not fucking around, so no way this can spread. Also, the masks should keep the throat gonorrhea at bay. So as long as the murder hornets don’t start spreading it, we’re good

We need more Freedom Freedom of Christianity

We need more Freedom Freedom of Christianity

Will there be a complimentary recording of Musk yelling “hey pedo guy”

Yea I’ve certainly seen plenty of MD administrators do dumb insensitive shit. But I feel like at least they do the PR part better. I don’t think there’s a way that the hospital comes out of something like this looking good, but this man just did a master class in how to make things worse.

Because apparently 71 million people got a taste and said “please sir may I have some more”

Hospital administrators are rarely on the same team as the physicians. You will note that this man is an MBA, and not an MD, and his focus is more likely to be on synergy and other business bullshit rather than providing actual care to people

You forgot Corey Lewandowski