Only if the hood turret can be made to shoot donkey sauce

This thing is actually pretty cool - I thought it would be like a harpoon, but basically just a net that wraps around the wheel/axle. Seems really dangerous for the cop doing it though, but I guess they don’t bust these out for garden variety shit

Lots of meth

I witnessed a van full of Trump supporters pull up to an adult book store, then do some ranting about the election at a nearby landscaping company. But the thing is that they were also right next to a crematorium. And what else would one be doing at a crematorium besides destroying evidence. I’m willing to submit an…

I hope the secret service agents taser him a few times as they drag his ass out in January, just as a little thank you for the gratuitous covid exposure and having to deal with his shitty family for 4 years. 

They should probably start the fumigation now. 

You forgot Russia

Lawyers gonna lawyer

I think dying of Covid during the lame duck portion of doing a shitty job in a shitty administration is the opposite of going out on top. It’s kind of a shame given what he has accomplished, but also fuck him for using his position to actively try to make people’s life worse

This is the part where the Trump campaign has gone full It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Frank is Trump, Dennis is Kushner, Mac is Don Junior, Charlie is Eric, and Dee is Ivanka. Giulini is played by Rickety Cricket

I guess the halloween mask guy couldn’t decide between wearing blackface and just putting on his klan hood, so decided to compromise? 

Maarten Struijs, when reached for comment, was both relieved and a little disappointed that he didn’t choose that site for his other work, “Impaling spikes”

дорогой товарищ, принеси мне тёплое молоко, только со льдом

I hate asshole joggers who run by me huffing and puffing without a mask. If you can’t run with a mask, don’t fucking run, I don’t need your aerosols in my face as you run by. 

I wish someone would ask her something about the Catholic church abuse scandals, just to see if she’d lose her shit a little

Makes sense. Columbus was about as much of an “explorer” as trump is a “businessman”. 

I’d like him to spend some time intubated and on a ventilator, then recover but with such poor lung function he can’t get a full sentence out of his pouty mouth. Then he and his whole family can go to jail

Most appropriate use of “over the air update” ever

I have a friend who reviews everything on google right after a meal and puts what she ate and whether it was good. She has a custom google map set up with the places she has eaten and with her reviews she can quickly see whether to go back and what to get or not get. It’s an involved system but seems to work well

Haha, yea, a lot of the people giving advice because they’ve had one or two kids successfully don’t seem to realize that kids, family situations, and available resources may be completely different. What works for a family with an easy-going kid and a job that ends early enough to make a fancy dinner may not work for…