I totally thought that headline said “fingering”

I totally thought that headline said “fingering”

I mean, there’s not even a reason for him to try to be discreet or smart with planting evidence. If he gets caught, absolutely nothing happens

He looks like the guy who’d sell you a P. Diddy style shrimping boat.

I’ll bet this Project 21 thing is run entirely by rich white people and uses a lot of stock photos of black people. I’m sure they’re also working hard to reduce black on black violence and improve relations with the police

I mean, she’s a woman and she’s out in public, which is a huge nono. She should be home and naked except an apron, cooking up a meal while doing kegels so that she can please her man when he comes home from a long day of doing manly manly work things. That’s like the entire conservative platform!

Interesting trades considered?

I think the better question is why the cops even felt like they need to come for that call. Like did she tell the dispatcher what was actually going on, or said something about threatening behavior? Like they seriously have nothing more urgent that they actually responded to this call within the timeframe of the class?

Everyone know the conservatives are just upset that no cuckoldry videos were shown. 

“I’m a doctor - do I have to put on a show for my patients full time, or is it enough that I’m giving them a service. Sometimes I’m just tired or hung over or not into it. I don’t see why I have to smile and be nice and kind while I ask them about their symptoms and offer suggestions.”

ICU nurses are generally badass amazing people

As a jewish person, I just don’t get black or jewish or any other minority Republicans. I hope you enjoy your tax cuts and Jesus when the white nationalists come to take your shit away.

This is assuming you don’t need a referral from the first doctor for all the other doctors

I think they should start having fan raffles for coach of the week at the end of each game. You managed to sit through a whole game and extract your scrotum from the puddle of frozen beer and vomit you’ve been sitting in? You get a 1 in 1000 chance of getting to coach the Jets next week. They can’t possibly play any…

The Philly teams should all just unite in a common mascot, the Philadelphian. He’ll be a 300 lb man with dead eyes, a shirt made of scrapple, and his dick sandwiched in a cheese steak with extra wiz. His shtick will be breaking into Tom Brady’s house every Saturday night and drunkenly slurring “How do you like them…

The good news is that Buffalo has a similar climate to Chicago and they will gladly welcome a man of his talents

I’m pretty sure that the Jets’ film review consists of the buttfumble on repeat

Philadelphia? Really? A lot of the time I just go to Newark instead - better flights and a better airport

I take care of kids with cancer for a living, and I find my work to be infinitely less depressing than any single Jets game. 

People I know who went to HBCUs universally describe them as places where people went to actuallty get an education, not to kill 4 years partying with their douchebros and playing lacrosse before their daddy got them a job at his company. 

If he wanted to fuck people in the ass while being a father figure, he should have coached at a catholic school.