The IOC would feel really bad about this, but in their defense, the bribes were exceptionally large.

Can I hang this is my racist supervisor’s office?

Well, we already know he’s drinking piss.

“What kind of things do you like me to do with you body?” Jeb said as I looked over the contract. “Do you like it when I keep it from healthcare?” Oh my. My inner goddess screams YES but I blush.

Get we get Phil Simms off of Madden? I can’t play without any commentary but his is especially bad. Why does he call out Nantz’ terrible golfing ability so much? IT’S NOT FUNNY, PHIL!

I expect we’ll hear an apology from him tomorrow. It’ll be Tuesdays with sorry.

I’m just getting really tired of people misunderstanding what a capital T “Theory” means in science. It doesn’t mean its an untested, unverifiable speculation. But this is not going to change. Because the Bible says stuff so that means its true. So much easier that way.

Especially considering, based on the inferiority complex many of them share for some annoying reason, there’s no way majority of the (male) fans are even 6"s.

I mean. It is true. All NFL coaches are physically superior monsters who intimidate their players into doing what they are told to do. Bill Belichick is what, 8 feet tall, 450lbs? When he tore that one offensive lineman’s spine right out of the guy’s back I thought, gosh there is an offensive genius, no wonder his…

“There is nothing better than a middle aged woman doing some pearl clutching over something that has literally no impact on her life.”

That must be the most infuriated she’s been in all her 4 years as a Seahawks fan.

This could get awkward as that nickname is usually reserved for UNC student athletes.

And I thought the strongest reactions to the Rams leaving St. Louis were posted this morning.

But when you get a vasectomy, it’s not immediately effective. In fact, my doctor told me it would 60 to 75 ejaculations before I was cleared of sperm. I did a quick calculation on the frequency my wife and I had sex and realized I was going to be fertile for 5 or six years.

Man, dude just can’t stop leading with the crown of his helemet, huh?

My late uncle, who was awesome, had almost all of those NFL Films with the big hits that were huge in the late 80's.

“NFL’S BIGGEST HITS, VOL. 1"
“NFL’S BIGGEST HITS, VOL. 2"
“BONE CRUNCHING HITS”
“SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS CREATORS: LAWRENCE TAYLOR”
“VERTABREAKERS”
“BRAINBUSTERS”

I wish when I drank with one other person in a basement it was considered was partying.

Petrine should acknowledge that Johnny’s semi-functional alcoholism is real, and will eventually lead him to his true calling in life: coaching.

“Concussion” I think

Better Geno Atkins come in your face than Pacman Jones shoot all over your back.