Sitting on that has got to hurt your BACK BACK BACK.

But in order to be released, he must first undergo a physical with team doctors

On the sideline, Ben Roethlisberger looked up, suddenly overcome with a strong sense of déjà vu.

“... and when I hung up the phone it occurred to me, my boy was just like me yeah, my boy was just like me...

Rams are giving up 6.9 yards per plays to the Saints.

Knock knock.

Paterno probably could have avoided the injury had he not been too busy looking the other way.

Everyone hop on their Vespas.

I say this to my kids all the time. They never understood it, then we moved near a childhood friend and she said it to my kids. And I was all, I TOLD YOU IT WAS A THING!!! In hindsight, showing them the video would have been easier than moving

“In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the HOLY SHIT!”

It’s OK, I’ve heard that if you pack it full of rice for a few days it’ll be alright.

Just before the final out, my 95 year old grampa, veteran of two wars, cancer survivor, and long-suffering cubs fan, pulled me aside and, with a tear forming in his steel grey eyes, said, “The blacks ruined this neighborhood and your sister dresses like a whore.” This was for him.

Well, he just rewrote biblical history.

I’m 29 and I can not tell you how many times I’ve daydreamed about going back and playing little league, not as a kid, but as an adult. I would fucking dominate and feel a power that I’ve never felt before. Imagine getting a 40mph floater right down the middle and taking it deep, rounding the bases while staring…

Better than the Falcons and their brief slogan “Weak Dogs Get Drowned”.

I wish I had this feature for subtlety telling my wife that she doesn’t fit into that dress anymore.

Colorblind Punter Can’t See Opponent, What He Does Next Will Shock You

I’m so sick of this conspiracy bullshit. Everyone either saw it live or on televised broadcast. Those girls were plenty hot enough to melt Kevin Ware’s tibia.

“The reason I bring all this up,” Pitino says, “is those girls were hot enough to melt steel beams! Hooah!”