Now is not the time for rhetorical musing! Help us find her phylactery before she rejuvenates. Also, keep an eye for a 5000 gp diamond so we can raise the rogue.

As the World Burns

No, that's the sequel, Godzilla vs. The Smeg Monster.

Trump: "You'll be head of the ATF, assuming you pass the background check, aka your liver and both kidneys are a match for Bannon."

This sounds suspiciously like how a sentient Netflix attempts to kill off humanity. {KFPB is immediately crushed by a falling Redbox kiosk}

Discovery Channel? Ha ha, freak! {quickly hides Meerkat Manor-branded dildoes}

I think Kushner, like most Trump associates, is more likely to fall through a window off a roof and land on a radioactive umbrella (which the coroner will then label "Natural Causes").

Just imagine orange naked Trump teabagging random furniture in the Lincoln Bedroom. Disturbed now?

Hoat the Goat: {does victory dance}
Announcer: "FLAWLESS VICTORY!"

Can we all chip in toward $5000 for a bullet to kill Sandler's Netflix career?

Even Hitler never used Alanis Morissette on his people.

Oh Chachi, you're so vain, you think Moran's death is about you?

You'd think Tim Gunn would be a shoe-in for Chief Justice of the Fashion SCotUS, but surprisingly, it's Notorious RBG.

Because it's confusing for consumers to look at the label in a blouse and read Serta Perfect Sleeper or Sealy Posturepedic.

I thought British English was a subset of Received Pronunciation that had been optimized for speakers who'd survived horrifying dentistry experiments.

That's odd, so does Giuliani.

"Dear Adult Diaper Forum,

Boo! Down vote!

Stealing forty cakes sounds like something he'd do just for sh!ts and bloody phlegm-coughing giggles.

He still leaks white blood.