I’ve been expecting them to make a Bill-Maher-esque heel-turn some day. Maybe this is it.

I was born and raised on cold vinyl bench seats. Young people today don’t know how good they have it!

With the new shot, I just filled my card up! Don’t I get a free sub or something?

You mean that if I don’t see this insanely long film, Kevin Costner loses his (unbuilt) dreamhouse? I can’t deal with this kind of emotional blackmail.

She’ll either be shamed out of existence or elected governor. There’s no in-between.

We’ve got a new edgelord here people! He’s the commenter his brain says the world needs!

That cartoon had the misfortune of debuting a month after Batman The Animated Series, which showed you can make a great-looking superhero cartoon with subtlety and nuance in the writing. By comparison, the cartoon took my beloved X-Men and presented them as if an angry five-year-old with a crayon was in charge.

Different groups of people have such wildly different takes on what makes a good X-Men story, and consequently significant chunks of the audience will be disappointed no matter what they do.

My wife, who learned English as a second language, said she found it exhausting, and I kinda agree. You know it’s too wordy when the subtitles have to paraphrase the spoken lines just to keep up.

It’s Educational!

Here’s a cool thing to do. If you are installing a granite countertop and you need to cut out a hole for a sink or cooktop, ask the installer to keep the cut-out piece and finish the edges. Depending on the size of it, you can use it for the top of a little side table that would match your countertops exactly.

Every picture of Russell Brand makes me feel like if I accidentally brushed against him in a hallway, I’d have to immediately go take a shower.

Sounds the same to me.

“Spank me, woke mob, spank me! I’m a naughty commenter!”

I’m looking forward to Russel Brand starring in an action flick with Steven Seagal.

I can imagine the driver of one of the Jungle Cruise boats finishing one of those awful corny jokes and then a bear lunges at him from above. Now that would be funny.

There needs to a kind of Clippy for old people when they are being interviewed.

I’m sure this happens to Pete Davidson all the time.

Those sunglasses are amazing. I want them.

Aren’t traditional tape measures easier to use? I don’ t have to roll over the whole distance — I just have to note the position of both ends (and with a metal tape measure just one end). With respect to recording the measurements, I can just dictate them into my phone which is always nearby.