I agree. Religion is like tarot cards — you see in it what you have in yourself. If you want to find excuses to allow rape, or to hide misdeeds then you’ll find your excuses in any set of words or beliefs you choose. Religion didn’t rape the kid, and religion didn’t give the council of elders a special pass to keep…

Google for white house intern pics and you get a lot of earnest suits. Wait, is it the knees? Is it because some of those skirts don’t reach the ground? Many a family man has fallen because he saw a woman’s knees.

I’m trying to imagine a world where the 16 year old working the register is somehow able to change the staffing, kitchen, or the space-time continuum in such a way as to be responsible for the speed of food delivery to customers. Also where she would use that power just to slow down food delivery so to slightly…

I think the first story broke my brain. Why would he care how the drink was rung up if he wasn’t paying for it anyway? Why does he think he has the right to determine how he’s charged? How to Starbucks employees manage to not throw hot coffee on people like this?

Our sun is relatively cool and close, Rigel-zoned would be safer.

Step 1: Declare undying love and soul mate status to woman you’ve never met on a social media platform.

What’s further away than friendzoned? Enemyzoned? Horrifyingzoned? GetItOffMeGetItOffMe-zoned? **shudder**

It’s the sign of a narcissist. Everything good in the world is about them, but anything bad in the world is ALSO about them. So those are the words he worries applies to himself, when he isn’t hiding behind his ego. All his insult are the same, because they are all about him, not about his target.

Everything Trump does comes across as skeevy, icky, and creepy. If he donated all his worldly goods to charity and became a buddist monk I’d assume it was because he was about to be caught for tax evasion.

It worked in ‘Bed of Roses’, right? So clearly it should work in real life. Although there is a notable difference between sending someone their favorite blooms, and sending someone really expensive blooms. (My husband gets me gift cards to Heirloom Roses instead of dying blooms).

I figured it out as a side effect of trying to figure out who gave us the two gifts that had no gift cards (we had to try to match them to other tagged gifts via wrapping paper design). I also sent out thank you cards to everyone who attended — gift or not — because I’d already addressed and stamped the things and…

Probably my best chance at an impartial witness? Honestly, having not been in that situation, I can only imagine that any and everything would look threatening at that point. I doubt I would want to wear the same clothing again, or go to the location, or ever see anyone or anything involved. PTSD upon seeing a Belgian…

Damn, where are your police dogs trained? It’s considered inappropriate to have drug search dogs also do protection work because the dogs need to be able to interact with little kids and teens. That’s why they are trained to give a passive response — usually sitting down. A police dog should never thrash unless he’s…

I don’t know all that much about religion, but is “please swallow this rosary” an accepted way of warding off the devil? I inherited a couple of rosaries and haven’t a clue what to do with them.

Thanks! She’s pretty awesome. I don’t think I was ever ‘forbidden’ anything unless it was limited by financial reasons or laws of physics — so long as I could make a good enough argument. She had to have the patience of a saint.

My bridesmaids wore “whatever black dress you have or like”, which freaked out my sister-in-law. When I was bridesmaid for her wedding it was a seafoam green satin number that no amount of tailoring could make look good, plus shoe, nail, and jewelry recommendations.

I was NOT going to look up all those addresses AGAIN. It was bad enough doing it for the invitations (I didn’t do save-the-date cards, because pre-invitation invitations are dumb).

When I was training as a vet tech tongue, lip, nose and eyebrow piercings were all strictly forbidden because a student had her nose ring pulled out by a flailing dog and required cosmetic surgery. They said they wouldn’t check for under-clothing piercings but please keep in mind that any piercing may be squashed…

It’s only a gift if it’s not required. If it’s required, it’s a fee. If you are charging your wedding party fees, you are an ass.

Bride tip that never makes the magazines: Suggesting handmade, homemade or recycled gifts will make your guests happier, and the gifts will be more awesome than anything on your registry. You’ll never know that your great aunt makes fabulous quilts or your college roommate’s husband is a portrait artist otherwise.