His cry on releasing the shot was, “Excuse me while I whip this out!.”

I wish to hear Gabby Johnson’s call of the play when he saw it with his telescope.

A WHITE basketball player?

He was extended a laurel and hearty handshake!

Rockridge was so excited they named him the new sheriff.

Reverse roles. This was his actual dad and after this while rubbing his still hurting forearm he says to his son “You think your stepdad Jerry will ever do that for you?” and his son days “I never liked Jerry”

That guy was actually his step dad. The kid hadn’t really taken a liking to his new step dad and usually only talked to him in passive aggressive remarks. Step dad thought that a trip to the ball game would change all of that. Kids love sports! But when he got there the kid wasn’t impressed and after every play would…

Kid learned a valuable lesson: never tweet.

Where can you buy an incredibles jersey? I’m.....asking for a friend.

He was only into restricting guns when black people started getting them. I don’t know that he believed in global warming, I’ve never heard that, but I imagine it could be true. Nevertheless, I do know that he spitefully removed the solar panels that Jimmy Carter installed from the White House, and there was that time…

I know a lot of folks aren’t on board, but seriously, this is my new nerd crush.

Referring to women as “females” definitely helps your credibility here...

My opinion is best summed with a gif.

Abso-fucking-lutely, Senator Warren.

Reminds me of gerrymandered voting districts. What is this cookiemandering conspiracy?!

I literally want to actually kill myself reading the insane number of stupid comments related to this article. What the actually fuck is wrong with you people?

the dude with the tits?