What people don’t get is that Netflix isn’t a media company basing performance off of traditional metrics like viewership. It’s a tech company who’s interested in growth and subscriber retention.

Counterpoint: our president is a cartoon rich guy who literally shits in gold toilets and cheated his way to the office. (He might also get away with it, too, thanks to control of public opinion through traditional and social media.) 

I’d like to believe Nintendo circa Wii launch was genuinely interested in bringing the most fun to the player. I agree, from a supply chain perspective this doesn’t make any sense. A corporation making decisions that benefit the end user instead of increasing short-term profits by .8%?!

Oh, they literally meant “remake,” as in “shot for shot, and including original actors” remake.

Holy shit what a burn.

The entire premise of calling yourself a “Satanist” is meant as a mocking, deliberate reference to Judeo-Christian theism. To pretend like anyone worth taking seriously is taking this seriously is silly. The Pastafarian reference is spot on.

Is this from Bojack Horseman? Because it could be. 

Which Netflix marvel series do you mean? Because that sounds like all of them. 

Is that Julianne Moore in the header image?

Now I’m cackling like an idiot at my desk. Happy friday.

I once made a drawing of the property brothers but with dicknoses. It’s my finest artistic achievement and still makes me giggle.

“John Benjamin Still Has a Van.”

I know Netflix wants another one of its own “game of thrones,” but I didn’t expect this show to lean so hard into fantasy for its final season.

I’d love it if this were the reason she resigns from the council.  (Assuming she does.)

Wow, what a pretentious white asshole.

Can we all agree that reading articles about upcoming movies or released movies or movies in general will include plot information? Keep spoilers out of titles, sure, but no need for childish spoiler warnings on the color of spider man’s new hat from a leaked set photo. 

“There’s plenty more low income, minority youths where this came from.”

Ah, quoting the fine print of your terms and conditions. What an excellent way to improve strained customer relations.

But seriously. Popcorn is like 99.5% profit, and so is soda. They’d lose very little. 

That’s what kills me about this. Joel McHale is practically free because it’s production cost is so low. Why not just do a little more?