Forwarding message to coronavirus:

“Camila Cabello and Shawn Mendes kiss during coffee break in Miami.”

Probably. Everything is probabilities. You probably won’t die in a car crash. You probably won’t be murdered when someone might probably break-in to your home. Probably.

What you really don’t want to do is have a medical emergency on the weekends...

Kayne supports Trump. What else do you need to know?

Fuck the world. We just made some money!

Nothing like doing the right thing after everyone tells you you’re doing the wrong thing.

Democratic Socialism sucks (until there’s a pandemic).

Are we talking about the same car dealers that try fucking us in the ass whenever we try to buy a car?

“This is all a pretty dark vision for autonomous vehicle”

“reduce the waste”

We’ve all been guilty of being a little racist. For instance, I still call Donald Trump “The New York City Virus.” I know it’s not fair to NYC, but I’m still having trouble accepting responsibility for our country electing that immoral pile of shit as president.

Gamestop, you done fucked up.

And since so many still do not know if they’re infected, wearing a mask is still a good idea. Take it from a hospital nurse. We are all wearing surgical masks (no N95s available). We are as concerned about getting the disease as we are about spreading it to our sick patients. Wearing one may not save you, but it won’t…

How you like that socialism now, capitalism?

$19.99 stream. Get bent Universal. Pay me to watch your stupid movies.

Hang on, then why bats?

I just pop them in my mouth for 20 seconds (I mumble the Birthday Song twice) and voila! All clean.

I want them to get Trump in the room with them. Have someone walk around coughing and shaking their hands. Whoever walks out of the room in two weeks gets to be President.

If they do live, the medical bills, criminal charges, civil suits; gonna make them wish they didn’t live.