I'm using this phrase as foreplay dirty talk now. "Open my door, handsome stranger. Be careful, it gets a bit stuck, the humidity lately just causes it to swell up in the jamb."

I only just placed it.

"He feels betrayed because he claims Katie never gave him any warning she was leaving him."

def Kris.

from kris or from jared?

Yeah, definitely starting to pick up a creepy Joker vibe here. Couldn't see it before, but it's growing on me.

Wouldn't a great show be: something about the fashion industry other than Project Runway? I would love to see a program that analyzes the cut, color, context, fit and history of the clothes and designs, highlighting upcoming trends, celebrity stylists, designers, how celebrities themselves choose what they like to…

From the Bieber article:

Is this the same person who used to post here all the time talking about how Marc Jacobs ripped off her designs? I kinda hope so.

Tourists are literally the worst people on earth.

Sing "Heaven is a Place on Earth" at the Vatican.

I'm going to tag Stonehenge.

A tourist tagged their name into the Luxor Temple last year, so add that.

I'm going to spray paint a giant penis on Christ the Redeemer's face in Rio if anyone else wants to join.

Great. First, fucking at the Great Pyramid of Giza, next, leaving your mark at the Colosseum.

Idiots. And honestly, with my extremely limited knowledge of the Italian legal system, I'm fairly confident I'd be on my best behavior there and try not to piss anybody off by doing stupid things like this. Throw the book at them.

He makes the therapist roll their eyes.

Who talks like that in therapy?

Seriously. I love it when people move on to Pretentious Level Humbleness.

Fizzgig loves life too much to be Kanye.