Today's LEO considers the citizens of the United States as enemies.

Ok, lets just get it out of the way.... the news here isn't that Sarafin's gay, it's that someone at ASU is pursuing a Master's Degree.

Mitchell has also found himself welcome in Athens' renowned music scene, where he's the lead cellist for Flat On Our Faces, the city's first prog-rock-ambient-symphonic tribute to the team's SEC Championship showings.

Knitting is very calming. Until you drop a stitch or discover a mistake three rows down. Then you want to punch a hole in the universe.

Things did get awkward during one meeting when Mitchell mentioned that he was a split end. The book club then spent the next 45 minutes recommending various shampoos and salons.

"Don't draft this guy."

Myrtle Beach is definitive proof of my 13-Hour-Drive theory.

Was hoping one of the fans would mention Richardson cutting his sons out of the franchise. World's Greatest Dad

The best part about heritage is picking and choosing which parts to cherish/throw in everyone's faces, and which parts to ignore/sweep under the rug, duuuuuh!

Goddamn, that mascot looks like a rapey homeless dude. No offense to homeless people. Lotta offense to whoever created that creepy fuck.

All these guys — Gruden, Dungy, Mooch, Billick, and Jimmy Johnson — learned what John Madden figured out in the late 70's: coaching in the NFL sucks unless you have a once in a generation QB. And then it's still a crap shoot.

Last October we bought tickets to the TB/Carolina game as part of our big Florida vacation trip. The day of the game, I missed a call from a TB number and the voice mail was from someone at the Buc office wanting to discuss our tickets. Panicked, I call them back because the game was starting in a couple hours and I…

Ok, Maddy's Brad Johnson story is jaw-dropping.

Honestly, a coach would be a fool to have a 90-hour a week ultra-stressful position where he's judged entirely on outcomes he's only partially in control of, when he could instead get paid seven figures to have a no-pressure can't-be-wrong analyst job.

I didn't know until about 5 years ago that there was no city called Tampa Bay.

That sounds about right. I was actually born and raised in Tampa. Someone tried to have me preserved in carbonite just for that very reason.

A Schiano man spends all night making rape Gifs and has his teenage son post them on jezebel in half our intervals.

No mention of the MASSIVE confederate flag Tampa has at the intersection of its two major interstates, right by the exit for MLK Boulevard?

Let's try this again, not on my phone: it's a damn lie that half the people in Tampa Bay are from somewhere else. It's closer to 90%.

I would argue that Marvin Harrison is a way more competent version of Aaron Hernandez, seeing as how they haven't been able to charge him with anything even though we all know he's running a mob out of his Philly car wash.