Since you have to buy his book to get his poem, I think the poem and treasure hunt aren’t really the point for him. A self-published book, no less.

Here is the poem in its entirety. Thousands have failed to decipher it, but perhaps you will be one to finally figure it out:

If you are going to die looking for treasure, why not just find the Lost Dutchman’s Mine. Then you have the fun of seeing what form the curse will take AND your family can claim you were played by Humphrey Bogart in a movie.

If you death wasn’t on the table it’s just a scavenger hunt. Those kids in The Goonies almost died a bunch of times.

An onlooker captured some video of the seizure, which was made using a device that I don’t think I’ve ever seen before

An onlooker captured some video of the seizure, which was made using a device that I don’t think I’ve ever seen before

Do you keep your arm constantly damp and in close proximity to a body of water? If not, you are a bad frog tattoo owner.

Tardigrades can survive temperatures from -328°F to 300°F and can even survive the vacuum of space. I would have gone with tardigrades.

We don’t need another concern trolling op-ed about the Trumps.

I’m in the “so-called-higher-organisms-are-really-just-large-carriers-of-bacterial-level-micro-organisms” camp of biology. My existence is a tool for replication mechanisms, and an environment in which micro-organisms of many types can cooperate in their own continued survival and replication.

Feel like the writer just wants to talk about frogs. We can talk about frogs.

But those people who are fishes out of water were often the most vibrant ones in the room. I’ve begun to recognize a social type, the Amphibians — people who can thrive in radically different environments.

Or maybe not be a fucking 10 year old and get off Facebook.

I’m beginning to think that being able to cut open a living human body, even for the benefit of the living human body, may require a certain mindset.

People like you remind me why it’s not all bad that there’s no such thing as anonymity online.

I was at a gym with some women the other day & one of them said to another, my son didn’t get asked to the tolo (girl ask boy dance) because all the girls are lesbian, bi or feminists. I didn’t have the heart to follow up with a question about FEMINISTS. People are so weird/dumb/gross. I don’t even know anymore...

She looks like a whiter Racheal Dolezal.

I took my husband's last name because I no longer have an identity of my own. #sorryfeminists

I love wearing the ring that signifies my marital subjugation. It's pretty and SO shiny.