Are you trying to say that Jesus, who sat and taught all who would listen, was anti-education?

You know that passage is less about paying taxes (with coins made in Caesars image) than it is about what to do with the thing made in God’s image, right?

I thought it was Mormon Jesus that wore cotton Dockers. They breathe well, which is so important when you’re wearing your Temple Garments.

I have a coupon for that.

Entitlement: a government program that provides benefits to any individual meeting certain eligibility requirements.

Yeah, I actually figured this out in High School, though THANKFULLY I was never the target for the sexist nerd bullshit, because no one wants to fuck the fat AND nerdy girl.

Amen.

I feel guilty every day for not working harder on getting my mom to convince my sister to get her tubes tied after the second. Her two oldest are absolute delights and smart as hell and hard workers and hate their parents and brother. It’s sad all around.

When I was a little kid, my Aunts and I had one big birthday with one cake. We had birthdates within 2 weeks of one another. I knew the date of my birth, but was like 10 before I realized that most people call their birthdate their “birthday”.

So, if I hire an employee, I can dictate that they can’t spend their paycheck on blow and hookers, two things I am morally and ethically opposed to?

That person is seriously unhinged and is not completely clear on what the definition of rape is.

I like using “Love and Logic” one liners on guys like that. “Oh, you can’t figure out the coffeemaker? Aren’t you glad I don’t believe that?!”

There’s an intersection like that near my house. I can’t even begin to guess at the number of times someone to the right of me decided to try to change lanes mid left turn, and then honked at me, as though I was responsible for nearly scratching their precious SUV.

Blame Satan didn’t work for Eve, and I’m pretty sure Dan is not going to fare any better with that defense.

Yes. Thank you Black People!

Never mix up baking soda with cornstarch when making chicken stir fry. You wind up with Sweet and Soapy Chicken...

I dig the clove-ish scent of Afta on my husband.

I have a 16 year old nephew with untreated bipolar disorder and a serious drug problem (already showing signs of being an alcoholic and he loves him some crack cocaine, just like his mom and Grandpa), and I would trust him with the button more than Trump.

He looked just like Joe. My mom would sometimes get pissed off at me because I resembled her two abusers (her father and my father). I can understand not wanting to look in the mirror and seeing the man who beat him daily.