I guess I shouldn't be surprised at any of this shit any more, but every time I see some poor kid being tormented by a sack of moral arthritics like these dims my hope for the future of mankind a little more.

"Satire"—yeah, right. I remember National Lampoon during its glory days; you guys ain't fit to lick Doug Kenney's sandals.

Folks: Your sentiments are wonderful, but talking to Lil' Christie is akin to addressing a decorative gourd and asking for its position on Cap and Trade.

This is what happens when dumbshit post-adolescents gain a pulpit and believe their humor drool is really "edgy."

@SarahMC: No, we don't. We love you. There's always some fucking creep pissing in the gene pool, and we're sorry.

My wife handles the finances in our family, since I'd trade the cow for magic beans if left to mein own devices. So we though it very strange when we were told by our chosen granite countertop people that both of us had to be at the showroom to choose the granite type and sign the contract. We were somewhat…

I want to shower right now, sincerely.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember when Cammy was writing in Salon a few years back that Ricky Martin was going to be the new Elvis.

I remember flying to Hawaii to my new Navy assignment. A gentleman took the seat across the aisle from me wearing a leg cast. He gingerly sat down, and immediately spoke to the woman in the seat in front of him. He asked her to alert him if she was going to recline her seat so he could shift his leg to the side and…

Since my wife's job is more stressful and time-consuming than mine, I do the laundry, ironing, and most of the other household tasks. I also handle the cooking as my dearest can't boil water—not being mean, her skills just don't flow in that direction. I'm hopeless with the finances, so she's got that albatross. …

I am against the death penalty. Not on a strictly moral basis (as I believe there are some crimes where is it fit, meet, and just), but it has proved to be poorly dispensed, barbaric in its process, unevenly directed, and finally, the chance that an innocent has been or will be executed is simply too great. I also…

@Girl-With-A-Pearl-Earring: The only thing I learned from my eight-year parochial school stint was how to survive being locked in a closet for four hours and exactly how it feels being paddled with a shaved 1" x 3". I still dislike nuns to this day.

I left the Catholic church over this and other medieval viewpoints. The ugliness of of their institutional bigotry of so fucking repulsive, it make me want to spit in Bill Donohue's face. Fuck them, their neadertard, bullshit dogma, and their Hitler-youth Pope. As the man said, "I kind of like Jesus; I just don't…

Just fucking great. Now I'm at my highly visible desk in the office with tears on my face.

@seejanerum: Agreed—Jones has always been a weak actor. Although, she's had a good eye for roles.

I still feel sympathy for Betty's character; her inability to evolve and her emotional distance from all around her. But is it OK we have a couple of villains on the show (Lee Jr., I'm lookin' at you, you damn SOB)?

At 52, you can bet your sweet ass I wish I could fit into a pair of skinny jeans. I wear braces vice belts, mainly because I like the look, but also because I've got Creeping Middle-Age Man Gut.

@SnideySense: One of the earmarks of the Taliban is that the vast majority of the followers are illiterate. They've never actually read the Quran and depend upon their equally demented leadership to explain the dogma; hence, the sincerely twisted version of the faith.

Is anyone really still listening to these stupid fux? They screwed up their golden chance with Napster, threw up every roadblock in existence to stop/slow digital music creation, and become the arch-villain of the century with their punitive lawsuit practices. I recall reading an interview with the previous…

The code words for the racism of the right have certainly become more colorful. Between this bullshit on immigration and their barely-disguised bigotry on Islam, their ugliness is on perfect display.