Mom?

Once, while bringing back breast milk from a long weekend trip where I did not in fact have my baby, the poor 20 something TSA agent just stared at me and asked “But...where’s your BABY!?!?” Like he was utterly baffled at the entire concept.

I explained to him that I was pumping because I was away from the baby, and he…

I want to live in a world where childhood rebellion involves reading.

They had an episode of My Favorite Murder on this recently. So incredibly sad. Joshua Sawyer’s mother kept his medical records for over 35 years, after most records for any case that Jones could have been responsible for had long since been tossed. He had been admitted after a fire at the family home where all…

How many times is Black Rod going to fall for that gag where the House of Commons slams the door in his face? They get him with it every single year.

Because tragedy something something comedy.

He was my earliest childhood Superhero memory and still the most memorable of performers to don the cowl. Rest in peace.

Those kids were born wearing khaki.

So... I did something today.

“For some reason, this issue of not being able to breathe seems of paramount importance to Kinja commentors.” - M.Pence.

“For some reason, this issue of the horrific, reawakened old ones has become a paramount issue for the planet.” President Pence, 2018

“For some reason, this issue of bear maulings has emerged as a paramount issue for our fur trapping party’s guide.” - Major Michael Pence, circa 1823

‘For some reason, this issue of slavery has become a paramount issue for the black people in this country.” -General Grant Pence, circa 1860

“Nam aliquam causam, et facti sunt exitus Wisigotharum est eamque intimam secum fert ut civium exitus.” Imperator Pence, 410 

“Why doth the peasantry fret so o’er this ‘Black Death’? ” ~Lord Pence, c. 1350 

“For some reason, this issue of Native Americans has become a paramount issue for General George Armstrong Custer.” - Lt. Mike Pence, at the outbreak of the Battle of the Little Bighorn

“For some reason, this issue of smallpox has become a paramount issue for the Natives.” Colonist Pence, 1616

“For some reason, this issue of icebergs has become a paramount issue for the passengers.” Captain Pence, 1912

“For some reason, this issue of atomic bombs has become a paramount issue for the Japanese.” - Mike Pence, circa 1945