i heard it as "they're schoolin' with the wrong people" which seemed like a small town sheriff thing to say.

i actually heard the jewish-showbiz thing too. apparently it really does help you??? like if you look at the percentages of people in jobs, there's an abnormally high percentage of jewish people in hollywood.

which was retarded btw >_______>

TO SERVE MAN IS A *gasp* COOK BOOK

fun story: my friend made his voicemail message a skit from Brian Reagan, and eventually converted his entire office and several customers to Reagan junkies. it was amazing.

ok can somebody explain the cat comment to me? i think he's saying that daryl is trying to domesticate himself, when he's really feral. or…….what??????????? THAT MADE NO SENSE JOE

that is my favorite picture. it has made my day.

also you can hide the people you don't care about. i have like 130ish friends but only get about 7 of them in my feed. you can fine tune their posts to prevent from seeing their buzzfeed posts or whatever and only see the good stuff.

you can pry my pajama bottoms off my cold dead body.

i just mentioned trilbys!!! it's funny how they're really nothing like fedoras but somehow we as a people pretend they are.

actually what we're talking about is a trilby. fedora's are what the men of the 40's wore but modern day fedora's are all trilbies. they're shorter brimmed and i think less flattering. that's why people say "you think you'll look like humphrey bogart or clark gable, but you won't!!"

just the mere mention of redwall makes me hungry :( i need some strawberry cordial and buttercup cream pasties

i thought everything you thought, exempt when mika came back, lizzie would insist it was still mika, and then mika would start eating lizzie while lizzie screamed and then carol would shoot both in the head.

people are freaking out on you, but i think it's poetic as well. i guess this is why you can never write narrative drama involving kids (and dogs for that matter).

can i just add, if the writer's actually read "The adventures of Tom Sawer" and "Huck Finn," instead of what they picked up while doodling through 8th grade lit, they'd have known Tom was the scheming, ring leader and the cause for most troubles. Huck was the follower, the innocent and believed in the good of all…

didn't british sailors allegedly suck on limes to prevent scurvy? (that's why brits are called "limeys"??)

THANK YOU. as a young 20something who doesn't want a relationship, i agree. that's not everybody's idea of bliss, and i'll "settle down" when i'm tired of being free :p

i love that he was subletting. that's such a blandly adult thing to that it's hilarious when in a family show. when do you EVER hear tv people talk like that? it's one of those hard to quantify qualities of adventure time

if our lovably sassy hero doesn't rename him "floppy dick,"
i'm leaving

i have a crazy sleep schedule, so most stores aren't open when i'm awake.