Why, back in my day of the ‘aughts, we only got to see truly batshit crazy politics once every four years, our president only lied to us to get support to start crackpot wars, and by God, that’s the way we liked it. I just don’t understand you kids today with your fake news, administrations with boundless conflicts…

Yes, odd that people were more concerned with who was leaking the information when it was their team another country attempting to influence our national election in favor of one very specific candidate versus what is likely a concerned staffer whistle blowing on a federal official committing illegal and vaguely…

Today I learned Kansas State was a “world-class university”.

Overheard in Lawrence, “There’s a Kansas State?!?”

In the case of the celebrity profile, that main idea is the set of attributes the writer wants to put over as defining the famous person.

Chuck E Cheese- I haven’t been to one of these places in ages. The video game cabinets have been replaced by educational games, but the animatronic show goes on. Across the table two time Super Bowl MVP, Eli Manning squirts Elmers glue into his mouth. As we wait for our sausage pizza, Eli leans in and confides that…

It’s about player safety. What if they infect the opposing team with cooties?

+1 JoePa was a saint!

+1 tarnished legacy

Joe Paterno’s son is already denying he knew anything about this.

Now witness the power of this fully armed and operational elementary school!

Judging by the supplies, that is a charter school bear. He has nothing to fear from Betsy.

awww, we’ve finally found someone who doesn’t mind the way Amazon ships a flash drive.

Semper Finance.

that is a retired NHL player crushing the Grammy Award-winning artist Justin Bieber.

No. You go through with the dance. You do it with gusto. Then you give the toast. You roast the groom. You then proceed to drink it all. Everything. I mean, every last thing. You do rails and bales. You smoke up out on the patio. Then you grovelfuck a catering server in the men’s bathroom with the stall door open,…

That’s what happens when you don’t combine your gambling with fun text messages.

When you get to my age that monotony is broken up by an hilarious story about their toddler vomiting at the worst possible time.

the story is as good as winning the money,”

I am so excited for this to lead to scintillating conversations with my friends about their recent sports gambling exploits. Thankfully that will lead into a quick side conversation around their fantasy football team, and finally we can discuss a bar they went to last weekend that is one of their favorites and has a…