She has one corgi, Willow, and two dorgis, Vulcan and Candy. She vowed not to acquire anymore but after the death of her close friend the groundskeeper at Sandringham earlier this year, she adopted his orphaned corgi, Whisper, a dog she knows and is quite fond of. I am not ashamed I know this royal dog gossip, not at…

Ah, Lloyd Benson. You might have been one of the least inspiring Vice Presidential candidates in one of the least inspiring Presidential campaigns in modern history but you left the Earth with one truly immortal burn.

As posted elsewhere, Willow and Amy wish you a happy Thanksgiving. I’m drunk AF and making s’mores RN:

Does your family have any desire to see you? If not, do what you want to do with your boyfriend and don’t worry about it. Not all families are close, nor do they have to be.

I mean, no one says you can’t call her a lying cunt and then move on. Best of both worlds!

Today I found another ghost kibble. Not sure if anyone remembers, a couple weeks ago I found a cat food kibble in the middle of my living room carpet. I thought maybe it got stuck in the vacuum, since I’d run it earlier (even tho I run it weekly, and it had been three weeks since Gus’s passing by then). Then the next…

Yusssss. Finally!

I celebrated five years sober on Wednesday. It still feels surreal sometimes. My daughter wrote the most beautiful, touching note to me. It was the sweetest thing I’ve ever read. Been a rough week emotionally, these sexual assault revelations are super tough and bring up a lot of stuff. Hope everyone is doing okay.

I had my last two wisdom teeth out last week (note: I am old at 35 to have this done but they didn’t cause any problems earlier in life so no need — just had a cavity in one recently so finally had them done) and it was SUPER easy. I had been dreading it for weeks since I was only getting lidocaine — and it was easy…

Thisis my 3rd attempt to post this, in case it gets teleported someplace random. I’m quite pleased with this manicure.

Your costume is amazing! Pupper is a very good dog. That one dude can die in a fire.

Soooooo.......a few weeks ago, I shared with fellow Jez gals I was going in for my first mammogram. I was late commenting, so understandably it didn’t get a ton of responses. The ones I did get made me feel tons better and I REALLY love and appreciate the support. I was so freaked out (hypochondriac since age 8) that…

Buster is home! I picked him up this morning.

WHAT ARE YOU ASKING FOR THIS HOLIDAY SEASON? It’s our first Christmas in our house as a family and I’m so fucking excited I’m dorking the FUUUUUUCK out. We went and bought our tree today and I’m putting that bitch up next weekend. My husband didn’t have a stocking (and stockings are the BEST PART) so I found him this…

Hugs for Buster-at least you know he’s safe.

A few weeks ago I posted about my dog, Buster, who was just diagnosed with a degenerative spine disease. After a week of trying to keep him on bed rest, it became painfully clear that there’s no way I can do it properly (I live on the second floor, and he refuses to poop anywhere on our block, let alone the apartment…

You can literally die any day at any moment by anything ranging from being hit by a bus or having a freak aneurysm. Save as you will, but if you’re missing out on things you’d like to do/experience now thinking you’d be able to do them in the future anyways, just be warned.

I have wondered if just name our future single payer system GoFundMe, maybe everyone would get on board.

On Tuesday, my doggy soulmate Buster was diagnosed with IVDD, a degenerative spinal disease. It’s not a death sentence, thank god, and many dogs live for years with the right treatment and care. But it’s still very serious. He’s on bed rest for two weeks, and after that we’ll have to be careful with any kind of rough…

Right before I turned 21 I moved to a new city, transferred colleges, and got an apartment by myself. I picked a place out on the third story of a rambling old Victorian mansion - a modest studio with white metal cabinets from the 1950's and a rusted fire escape which always gave me bad feelings. It was metal, and…