"Look at the chubby little bastards! Just sitting around everywhere! What are they, pets for chairs?"

thanks! also I love your screenname—that's one of the (many) names I call my sister.

NICE.

who IS this kid? if I show up to some premiere with an adorable shield will I get a hug from Chris and a piggy-back ride from Tom? if only there were a way that that could be not-creepy...

go for it! it's funny because it's true...

amazing comic! I haven't experienced this with babies yet, but 9/10 of those are definitely true of puppies, too. especially the sleeping-on-your-neck one...

clearly this calls for more rigorous experimental study. we might need to run a hierarchical linear model to test the effects of cat quantity, bed size, human sleepiness, and cattitude.

YES. I can't believe I forgot that one!

a gem from the Times of Israel article that HuffPo links to: the husband "told the Rabbinical Court in Beersheba that he was unable to sleep in his bedroom because the surface of the marital bed was constantly covered with cats who refused to lie on the floor."

thanks!

aaaugh, thank you! I literally just clicked on this story because I was like, "hey, I also wrote a comment that included a fake marriage quiz, how weird," and then it WAS ME and that was even weirder.

all signs point to Tom Hiddleston being the coolest person, ever.

yes, but what always happened in the meantime!? hijinks, that's what happened!

you seem like you're going to be a pretty seriously fantastic mom. expecting the best while preparing for the maybe-not-the-best sounds like a great attitude—good luck!

sincere question: what is wrong with toe rings?

I KNOW ME TOO! it should not be as hard to keep them straight as my brain is making it seem.

yes! teaching our cats the scientific method was a huge mistake.

mine just roams around pushing all the Things off of all the Other Things. and when I wake up and protest, looks at me like "I'm sorry, but if you didn't know that 4am was the time to nudge all the stuff off your dresser, THAT IS YOUR OWN FAULT."

oh, I'm just here to help you with your relationships (and to achieve that perfect Beach Bod with 8 simple tips!). oh hang on, here's my bud Rachel Bilson to tell you an embarrassing story about her awkward youth. if you're lucky, it will involve gym class, and periods!

I felt exactly the same way, so here's one to make up for our shared disappointment. (Note: it is based on my memories of how very cleverly disguised the quiz scoring system always was in Seventeen.):