I FUCKING HATE BEING A DOLPHINS FAN

For those who think there will never be another Usain Bolt, think again. Somewhere out there a young boy, sitting alone in his living room, was inspired by watching the unbelievable feats that Bolt has achieved. At that moment he said to himself, “When I grow up, I’m going to college, and becoming the greatest chemist…

I’m not an economist, but Noll and Szymanski are. (It’s my journalism degree that I got from a vending machine.)

You have no idea what you’re talking about. Neil deMause is one of the best-respected writers in the U.S. on the subject of franchise economics and stadium finance. He’s been covering this subject for decades, in greater detail than just about anyone. His book, Field of Schemes, was on the leading edge of covering the…

Someone else might be available, too.

Does the Dolphins quarterback steer US foreign policy? It would explain a lot.

WHY YOUR TEAM SUCKS: Miami Dolphins

Jesus Christ even teenagers looked like they were 40 years old back in the 80s.

You’re not the only one, but you’re all equally the worst.

I agree. He didn’t get two feet down despite making a baseball move.

You’re right. My apologies, hon.

To be fair, I’m roughly the same age as Scherzer and I got a similar injury after shampooing my hair the other day.

And even Kaepernick’s less headline-grabbing actions, like giving out free suits or donating to various charities, are far more important than anything he can do on the football field.

How long do they get to use the expansion team excuse? Bill Clinton was the fucking president when they were an expansion team.

Byron Leftwich will be on that list, just as soon as he completes his throwing motion on this pass he started in 2009.

“You can’t do ifs in our business.”

Wow, I would’ve expected Bisciotti to be the dunkee.

And congrats to all the Cubs fans for getting another moment to pat themselves on the back for feeling bad about how they ruined this guys fucking life all those years ago. It’s ok now, he’s got jewelry.

I dunno. Depends.

“The best way I can describe it is, having a diaper on & never changing it. And just sitting in that diaper the whole year.”