You know, there is a prominent black Chicago politician that’ll be looking for a new job soon.

Luke Walton has never lost a game as head coach!

Almost half through the season, and Bayern just lost their first match — to a team with one of the all time miracle turn around seasons.

The Shaqtus isn’t really Muslim, despite his given names:

Yeah he quit but I'm sure the writing was on the wall. They were giving up at least one PK per game!

You should do an article on Mönchengladbach. They were bottom table, playing horribly in Champions League, fired their manager, and now are undefeated in BL and almost so in CL too.

His throne is made of the classic old PDX carpet, which for some reason is a massive “thing” in Portland.

You don't find having sex on shards of broken glass incredibly hot?

“Clubber Lang is pretty scary keeds!”

“Bayliss, I will gouge out your eyeballs and skull-fuck you!”

Dexter Manley too.

My dear man, none of those players can hold a candle to William “Pudge” Heffelfinger:

Or Rob Brionas for PK.

Vaguely reminiscent of an aircraft colliding into twin towers?

Or, you know, the whole rape allegation thing.

Although he only does it at home games. You won’t see him at game today or the Final if Timbers advance.

¿Yo? ¡No es yo! ¡Es Dios!

I wonder how NEA or AFT would react to the school board saying a 5% school budget cut is NBD that “barely registers on the pie chart”?

The trophy ceremony for some of these may be underwhelming.