Many years ago, my dog got parvo before he was vaccinated. Untreated, it’ll kill nine out of ten dogs. He survived with treatment, but it was awful. He needed medicine and/or fluids every six hours. I was getting up in the middle of the night to inject him.

When my grandparents were building their house, my grandpa insisted on having a phone in the master bathroom, right next to the toilet.

I’m no professional reviewer, but I thought the first episode of season 2 of Loki was pretty bad. It was all wheel-spinning. The main thrust of the episode is that Loki is now timeslipping. Most of the episode is dedicated to fixing this new wrinkle, which they do, so we spent an hour just getting back to square one.

“It didn’t hire showrunners, but instead depended on film executives to run its series.”

That clip show was awful. And then they ended it with a montage while playing Green Day’s Good Riddance, which is the absolute worst tonal choice for Seinfeld.

OH GOD, THE CANISTER IS FULL OF LIVE STREAMS! KILL THEM!

“Link, a great darkness has come over the land — ”

Eh, this is the same world where every weapon was suddenly weakened and everyone in the world was like “sure.”

I mean, three of those ended in 2015.

From the sadly cancelled show Reboot: “Here’s what’s brilliant. It is both the funniest thing you’ve ever read, and you won’t laugh once.”

I was watching a later Freddy episode recently, and I’d never noticed that he had an Xbox.

There was also the one-two punch of avian flu, which made the price of eggs go crazy at the same time.

So it’s not going to completely change what the characters look like?

Pffft, tools never fail. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some codes to scan with my CueCat.

You and me both.

Because they’re not artists. They’re tech dudes who think they can take something squishy and messy like art and recreate it with cold engineering. They don’t actually understand what art is, why people make it, or why people appreciate it.

Do you actually not understand the difference or are you being contrarian?

Eh, the tech was pretty impressive in 2011. Especially if you were watching Mad Men at the same time.

Wow, their AI is so good that it made a character that looks nothing like the actor whose face was originally scanned!