dragula sucks in all the right ways. i will never change the station if it comes on. its the elios pizza of late 90's groove metal: its objectively bad, but always satisfies.

recently caught part of a red sox blue jays game and saw that the jays were fielding a guerrero, a bichette, and a biggio. its was a real who’s who of offspring of players from when i gave a shit about baseball. 

it hasn’t aged well across the board, but Raw is still the best recorded stand up set i’ve ever seen.

i met my wife on ok-cupid. i’m 6'4", she is 6'0" — on our first date she actually said that i was the first person she met on a dating site who was actually the height they said they were.

“don’t just stare at it, eat it” - derek ‘pat bateman’ jeter

ffs, don’t lump Katie Nolan in with Bill Simmons. That is just cruel and unusual punishment. Katie Nolan is a national treasure, while butthole Bill just crept back to ESPN to cohost PTI like a sleazy deadbeat going home to screw the estranged wife but leaving before the kids wake up because he can’t remember their…

adults who use straws should be mocked.*

holy shit, that is incredible. it rivals the best movie i ever heard of, which was when a friend of mine drunkenly screamed “use the fucking warp whistle, you cocksucker” at the dramatic end of the wizard.

i honestly think the sox will empty the vault to keep Mookie around. after this dismal ass season they will need to do something big to re-engage the fan base. and yes, i know that sounds insane given that they won the WS last year, but they are now a distant second fiddle to the patriots. losing Mookie just screams…

i know that reporters have a job to do... but after so many years of non answers, i don’t know why anyone bothers to ask questions not directly related to their next opponent or like, D2 lacrosse. but i guess a non-answer generated its own sort of news story.

i used to think the remake machine backlash was stupid.

at this point would a war bump be a positive one in the polls? after 17 years of american’s dying on foreign soil, only the biggest psychos want another conflict. or maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part.

Re: people thinking you’ve moved an outrageous distance away.

Is this a real take? This was submitted by Gavin Rossdale, right?

if other people can hear your conversation over their own headphones, they you are a jerk at the gym. I have remarkably strong hearing, so to drown out background noise i have my ipod at full volume in my headphones. if i can still hear you over my personal death metal concerts, you are entirely too loud. 

if you’re at the gym for the right reasons, you should be excited to see people trying to improve their health by working out, regardless of where they are starting out. As a former morbidly obese person, I love to witness someone else’s weight loss journey from afar. It reminds me of how far i’ve come, and i’m damn…

+1 for a coal miner’s daughter

cool, glad we’re about to take military action for a foreign oil concern which is soon to be a private corporation which won’t even be based in the US. 

Just What I Needed -  one of like 5 songs that i could listen to every day of my life and never get sick of. a perfect blend of punk and pop and everything else.