I worked in a video store in the 80s, when people were still renting the VCR along with the movie. It is where I watched Jaws 8000 times. My movie choices were not rented (Brazil, Time Bandits, Suburbia, Duran Duran Sing Blue Silver)

Chicago had a cheapo video rental place in Lincoln Square that was my hang out growing up. I’d be there for hours looking for movies and always end up with ‘Zone Troopers’ or ‘Last Starfighter’. 

Gah I still miss “Married.”  Gone way too soon

Edgar’s “I didn’t know it was a school” bit is the single darkest/funniest joke I’ve ever heard on TV. 

nice shake-weight-ing you’re doing there. you must be really strong at the internetz!

I’m waiting for the day when the header is just a black rectangle.

Lamar Jackson is not an elite quarterback. Then again, neither was Joe Flacco.

Oh my god. This immediately brought to mind the scene in Kill Bill where the hospital attendant had been assaulting her while she was in her coma and just jesus fucking christ. This poor woman.

Wow, then she must just despise this dirty liberal.

Just to cover my bases, if you see the Booger Mobile for sale on Craigslist, please let us know at tips@deadspin.com

This is literally the only form of Boston hate I will cosign. Boston is a lovely place in general as long as you don’t need to find your way around unassisted or deal with February but holy shit being in public in a college town with a big Irish population on Saint Paddy’s is just about peak awful.

“Nail tit.”
-Emmitt Smith

In recent years, the Yankees have been very comfortable with a rapidly declining SS in their lineup. Gotta re2pect the move here.

AKA “Lock myself in my apartment like it’s The Purge” Day.

oh god how did I forget this

“Send him to me.”

Oh I’m sorry, I can’t talk about that client’s secret, “Illegal” account.

They don’t remember that he’s a remorseless cop killer, who happily murders any police officer suspected of corruption?

For Our Consideration: We Like Josef Stalin And You Should Too