I’ve said it many times; conservatives don’t hate government; they hate not being in control of government. Or more accurately, they hate that anyone else besides them could ever be in control of government.

Because of partisan politics, and the majority of voters treating political candidates as if they were players on their favorite sports team. Ben Carson says ridiculous things! But since I root for the red team, i’ll turn a blind eye towards it like Cowboys fans defending Greg Hardy.

Good point. Groundhog for president.

“.....she has as much experience with innovation and entrepreneurship as the fat groundhog collecting acorns off my porch. Less, even. The groundhog is self-employed.”

Ben Carson can punt a football 500 yards.

Nah. The very fact that you feel inadequate and self-conscious about your ability to girl means you are, in fact, girling at normal levels.

You guys I’m starting to think I do a really bad job at being girl.

That’s it! The secret we’ve been waiting for!

“you are not my fucking mom!!!!!!!” is making me lol so hard.

I am perfectly willing to listen to all opinions on Star Wars and Harry Potter. Maybe even art if they just stop trying to tell me that I shouldn’t take birth control.

Is there something wrong with you? I mean, literally?

I am also #TeamPuppy

#TeamPuppy, all the way.

My wife literally dies in the presence of cats.

Hey, I watched America’s Next Top Model. I know I need to say, MYSELF!

just gonna write my response to this now so i don’t have to come back and comment in June when the decision comes in:

I’m confused as to what taking care of old people and birth control have to do with each other but sure.

Apparently that 175 year history involved being all up in their employees ovaries? It’s tradition! Not being able to dictate their employees medical decisions means they’re being persecuted.

“...We just want to keep serving the elderly poor as we have always done for 175 years.”

As a fellow curlyhead...