I can see his “Holocaust Remembrance Day”-esque fuckup already... the day before Kwanza, Trump makes an unforced comment about how he would improve international trade by finding “a middle ground passage for goods” with nations in Europe.

The odds of Trump actually knowing that Santa isn’t in the Bible are probably about the same as him ever stepping foot in a church or place of worship in his life.

The only easy casting for this is Ein. But even then, it’s a matter of finding a Corgi smart enough to drive a car when asked. 

He speaks like someone having an aneurism in real time, and yet every time I read or hear his mangling of the English language, I feel like I’m having an aneurism... while dealing with the world’s worst hangover.

Yep. Florida has Miami, Disneyworld, the Everglades and Cape Canaveral. There are at least some reasons to visit there, even if the state is back-asswards.

I had to do a search of people of note that come from Mississippi. Outside of athletes like Walter Payton and blues musicians like RL Burnside, the only decent people I could find that were born there were William Faulkner, Laura Bailey, Jim Henson, and James Earl Jones. And most of those people succeeded only after…

“Ah, you think shittiness is your ally? You merely adopted the shit. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn’t see a gesture of decency until I was already a man. By then it was nothing to me but blinding!”

It is beyond me how this milquetoast piece of human garbage rose to such a prominent position within the Democratic ranks in Congress. Ditto for Pelosi. A common octopus has more spine than those two.

When the bar for common decency is set so low within their ranks, even a hard-line Republican like McCain or Collins can milk the narrative as being “moderate” or a “maverick” though the occasional, performative gesture of defiance. And even then, that gesture is usually hollow, like Flake’s request to delay the…

truly elite-level ass requires that you be ass on the world stage

I blame the lake effect snow off of Erie. And the pollution (the Cleveland metro area has shitty air, the Buffalo metro area has the Love Canal superfund site).

I think there need to be some honorable mentions in this category that were/are ass, but not ass enough in a deep field of ass. I nominate the Mets, Houston Rockets, Arizona Cardinals, NY Giants, and LA Kings.

I know Trump is lying as usual about what little danger these migrants pose when he says toddlers and their mothers are “very tough people,” but refugees are tough customers. They’ve seen shit. Shit so horrible they’ve uprooted their families from home. They’ve risked everything to come here, over hundreds of miles on…

All the more reason to snuff out the leaders of industry staying our feet on meaningful action. Heads are going to roll because of climate change, and it won’t just be people who live today who suffer - people who will live and die long after we are gone will be damned to what has gone unchecked during our lifetimes.…

His playcalling sure does feels like a crime against humanity

Christ almighty do the Giants have horrible coaching on offense. How the fuck do you run Saquon only five times in the second half?

This is why the heads of the powerful need to roll yesterday, especially those of oil and gas companies. If not ASAP, an exponentially greater amount of lives will suffer and be snuffed out, from all species of life, and our planet will be irreversibly changed for the worse.

ICE are modern day Gestapo. That is all.

Only if he gets paid $1 an hour to do so

I’m hesitant to say that the sort of scoring we saw in Chiefs-Rams is going to be more commonplace. They just seem like really fucking great offenses in a time where the rules are already pretty favorable to them. Plus, their defenses scored a bunch too. It’s not like Goff and Mahomes traded 7 TDs each (though Mahomes…