Red Dead Redemption 2 in Dad Mode means hamming up the same RDRR joke over and over, to no laughs.

Dammit, the joke should’ve ended “absorb $4M of cap hit just to get a quarter back.” Fuck. My weekend’s ruined now.

SEAN PAYTON IS A SAINT

uh, no, seriously though

The Bills will trade the Chiefs a 7th-rounder and absorb $4M of cap hit for the quarter. 

Let’s Remember Morgana, The Kissing Bandit

+1 of all the dramatic things I’ve ever seen

I dunno, I never spend that much on the sox I dump my mediocrity into.

Ah, the old upside-down text trick, the preferred weapon of passive-aggressive teens who are into late-era Kanye West.

let he who has not run facefirst into the outfield wall cast the first stone

Commenting is hard. You gotta work like a mother to find new ways of making the exact same joke, over and over, like I do. Wanton repetition is just fuckin’ classless, man.

That keyboard line didn’t land the first time; I don’t know why you expected it to land the second.

Ben, was your first love war, or chess?

This is not going to be a short process.

Fans considered storming the court, but security personnel had them outnumbered.

Dipoto wouldn’t want to tread water if it were up to him, and he certainly wouldn’t want to trade away any of the players who have actual trade value.

I thought Jaguars Junction was created for football-related existential crises.

I strive to do worse every time.

Millennials live in a golden age of nostalgia.

SAS would like a word with you, and things of that nature.

There were a lot of bathrooms immediately outside the section, but the fan just couldn’t deal with another pick-six scenario.