“See My Vest.”

Sorry guys. The whole “The Simpsons is running forever” thing is my fault. I got one of those monkey’s paws in 1994.

You know what’s kind of crazy, or not considering who we are referring to, is that Donald has not really mentioned the people of Houston or its surrounding areas. He mentions Harvey a lot, he mentions the city of Houston a lot, but he does not mention the people (other than crowd sizes). There is no empathy or…

I actually had an offer of a green card marriage from a New Zealander many years ago. I turned it down because you know...legal stuff. Of course, I visited NZ later and have been kicking myself ever since.

And! - In an off-the-cuff remark, he noted that Long “really has become very famous on television over the last couple of days” 

Talk about a captive audience. And here in my little town a childhood friend is having a hard time finding a way to get out of a flooded area so he can get to the funeral of his son who is one of the sailors who died on the USS McCain. My message to the White House in regards to his situation were (shock, shock)…

He is THISCLOSE to bragging that he has the biggest hurricanes.

It’s what happens when you have a person who views everything as transactional.

Handcrafted by the finest child sweatshop in all of Bangladesh.

Oh that is so tacky.

I really do wish I could say I’m shocked that he made his response to a terrible natural disaster about himself, but, well, here we are.

Tacky, bourgeoisie assholes.

Hold up. That woman is not my FLOTUS.

“Later, spotting a crowd of people, he said “What a crowd!” and “What a turnout!”

FLOTUS hats for only $49.99

Good. I hope it cost her a fucking fortune.

I will point and laugh at Sarah Palin, who is politically irrelevant.

In the interim, I will point and laugh at Sarah Palin, who is politically irrelevant.

It was super weird that she was all “don’t retreat, reload!” and putting crosshairs on a map and was shocked that someone linked her to a political shooting.

If she really had a case she’d have sued when everyone first talked about the link years ago.