it seems like it’s taken on this new meaning, “the act of stating that you think homosexuals are making a bad choice”

Amazing how many people responding to you lack basic reading comprehension skills.

lol yup. I was hastily making dinner for a newish girlfriend, so I was highly distracted and thinking “I’ve got this”. I didn’t feel pain other than a quick sting and knew exactly that I had really f*d up. Fortunately not deep enough for stitches, and is only causing inconvenience for smartphone usage.

What it makes you is ignorant. And yes you did say that. Read your own words - “homosexuals are making a bad choice.”

In case anyone needs a reference:

I cut my thumb into four on the mandolin slicer 2 nights ago. I was being lazy when making a cole slaw and didn’t use the guard to hold the onion, not thinking about it. Totally stupid. Mandolin slicers are awesome, yet terrifying.

A great chef I once knew shared some kitchen wisdom with me “Every chef cuts themselves with a mandoline once, and then never again.”

This is where I learned about “chemical cauterization”. Just as fun as it sounds.

it would be a smart move on the person who punched to come in and tell his side before we get the victim and hear his side.

Nah! Fingertips are totally overrated.

This was a massive overpay for a dude that is gonna be Reggie Evans by the time his contract is up. The Cavs are gonna look like goddamn fools if they don’t get a ship this year.

Ahhh. I get it now. When those idiots were talking about being ‘vaguely mannish’ it was referring to Serena’s boyfriend.

My go to curse is: May every step you take feel like you’re walking on Legos.

“The person operating my legs at the time was not authorized to do so and does not kick/trip for me. Kicking/tripping of refuges carrying children is not one of my core values.”

“There are few things less heartbreaking than watching the desperate Mohsen fall on his small, crying son.”

Hah! Joke’s on you, my coworker turned me down before we even had a chance to start dating and eventually break up.

People may chuckle, but a collapsed Colon is no laughing matter.

Fell down seven times, got up, ate.

He flopped.