Counterpoint: Amy Schumer is loudly unfunny.

Where do you think they got the expression, “He’s a hugh asshole”?

Kissimmee? Fuck me!

No! But it sounds like a great premise.

To say nothing of her butt... ever heard of “Oks-tail soup”?

I’m pretty much up for anything except “swinging,” which sounds like a super-skeevy thing that happened in the 70s - like Watergate or wide lapels.

I have a slightly different explanation. I think it’s a way of transitioning from this very vulnerable place back to the dude who is wearing his dude-mask again. “Hey” is sort of shorthand for ‘hey dude’ which is shorthand for, ‘Ok, that’s over, should we go get a sandwich or just watch sports on tv?’

Seconded on the assumption that “d**k” means “duck.”

I figured it was analogous to a sneeze guard at a salad bar.

Wait until she starts using sex as a weapon.

For £5 million, I’d like to think I could score a better act than “Rizzle Kicks.”

Pics of Joe Biden = sexting.

Jesus. And I thought getting called up to the board in math class was bad.

Catch a tyga by the toe?

Now you're getting personal...

It’s an easy mistake to make. I still remember the time my wife came rushing out the front door, yelling “I said RAKE the leaves! RAKE!”

It’s the prisoners subjected to his indubitably shitty singing who should get reduced sentences.

Ante up! Kidnap that fool!!!

I get the feeling they are probably the two least sexiest people in Sardinia right now.

My thoughts exactly - like, you only just now realized what a fucking lunatic this guy is? Did you spend the last year in a fucking coma?