I could be wrong, but I think that’s a gosling, not a duckling.

We should have hacked Putins Netflix account and four starred a bunch of shitty Van Wilder movies to fuck up his reccomendations.

Combine those memes with the countless frowning or crying reaction emojis on FB and we can take the country back again!

Get off your high horse and stop underestimating us HamNo. When the time comes that we can’t take any more, the people will rise up and make some dumbass memes.

Pretty much everyone in my family is going, as am I. See you all there!

Get Scott Baio out there with a Guitar Hero. Done. Everybody happy.

Princess Leia and Ripley were my brunette heroines in a vast sea of vapid 80's blondes. Anyone who can’t understand what they meant for girls of a certain generation can go jump in a lake.

Now if you excuse me, I’m going to go light candles for the continued health and safety of Sigourney Weaver and Betty White.

Kellyanne has made grown men weep. Where she walks, toadstools grow in her footsteps. She is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored. She will leave the interview unflustered, totally in in control, and with much gnashing of teeth on the Left who are screaming about we totally got her this time,…

She’s on Rachel Maddow tonight!

:)

Haha only if you send them to lame people!

“........because remember that one time they got the very obvious John Edwards story right?! Stupid main streeeem media!”

You missed the time I photoshopped him with a buncha dildos.

I think the most amazing thing about the GOP primaries was how Donald Trump took each candidate’s best quality and flipped it on them. I just imagined them sitting around backstage at the debates.

It wasn’t until late in the year that I realized this tweet was really from Ted Cruz and not, like, a weird Twitter thing.

Here is a 100% true story. My next door neighbor voted for Trump. He erected a “Trump Tower” of sorts in his front yard, consisting of several hay bales with a Trump sign on the top of it (I live in Kentucky. I know, fuck me). This man told me with a straight face that the National Enquirer is the most reputable news…

The video of the girl wincing when he goes to kiss her is better than I remember. At the beginning she’s flicking at him like he’s a bug she wants gone. Great stuff.

What about the time his college roommate went to excruciating detail about what giant piece of shit he was/is.... Also, two words: Zodiac Killer! 

Ted Cruz yelling in Spanish is now my phone ringtone.

Awkward silence. Punctuated by the GPS. Which is voiced by Rush Limbaugh.