Why the Bears suck: Jay Mariotti once said Brian Urlacher was the face of the NFL. The end.

The Vikings beat the Lions once several years ago because the Lions missed an extra point as time expired that would have sent the game to OT. That's the franchise in a nutshell.

I guess Dwight didn't listen to anything Kobe told him during his time in LA.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let's not get carried away here, people. Barry's really blowing things out of proportion here. This wasn't written by Mike Lupica OR Jay Mariotti, so it can't be by the worst columnist in America.

Or "Weird Al-(Any Parody Song Ever)"

You somehow become the monarch of a tiny, extremely wealthy country, like Luxembourg or Monaco. What's your first major act as ruler? Start a nuclear program to become the new North Korea? Buy an NFL team and make the league move it to your capital? Order the streets paved with gold?

Definitely MLive/PFT/any terrible message board commenter. The bad grammar and spelling can't come through on the radio like they do in writing.

scheffler should be aloud to say that word whenever he wants. he's a blue collar lunch pail type player and just needs it to let of steam. it just means ignorant and your a moran if you cant see that

Browns fandom: the myth of Sisyphus personified.

To be the man, you gotta beat the man, and the only way to beat the man is to invest in gold and expose the Bilderberg Group on syndicated radio! Woo!

Considering his political career is going downhill, Anthony Weiner might as well license his name for this game.

Mike Vick should be higher. His later conduct was so egregious that it somehow made a lot of people forget that he allegedly gave a woman herpes using the pseudonym "Ron Mexico."

Here's how to make A-Rod a devout Christian: tell him about this hot new supplement called the "Blood of Christ" that looks exactly like wine, gives you mad power, and is completely undetectable a few hours after consumption.

If video games are a religion, then I'm going to say my Clayfigher: Sculptor's Cut cartridge is a holy relic and charge pilgrims to come see it.

Alabama census forms have only two boxes for "religion:" "War Eagle" or "Roll Tide." Sports are a big deal.

I love February 24. It's the anniversary of the date that Massachusetts native and former President John Quincy Adams started arguing the Amistad case in the Supreme Court. True abolitionist fans know what I mean.

I tapped out after the first page where fans were arguing using that word is OK because it just means "ignorant person" and doesn't have a racial connotation.

I hope one of those "gaming stations" is permanently hooked up to an NES that only plays Duck Hunt.

If WWE were introducing a new storyline with this, they probably wouldn't do so at a house show in South Africa most fans wouldn't even know existed.

Running the Gammons? Gammons Fodder? Boston Market? The name possibilities are endless.